iMPACT Wrestling Results (2/2): Impact Invasion, Week 1

Source: TNAStars.com

Opening Segment
Bully Ray and the TNA World Heavyweight Champion Bobby Roode come out to the ring to kick off the show from London, admiring Ray’s legs on the way to the ring. Ray asks who wants to see Jeff Hardy tonight, which gets a lukewarm cheer. Bully Ray follows that by yelling that they’re not going to because they put him through a table and now we’re never going to see him again. Roode says it’s great to be back here in Ireland, and he wants to make it clear that they do not suck because Bubba has the largest calves in the world and is the toughest guy and his best friend, Bully Ray. And Roode is the it factor, the leader of the Selfish Generation, and our World Heavyweight Champion. They’re very proud of what they did to Jeff Hardy last week, but they didn’t get the job completely done, so he demands that James Storm come out right now. Storm comes out and Bully Ray tells him to stand back and not think about coming near the World Champion, but now Sting’s music hits and he comes out to join the party. Mike Tenay mentions when Sting beat Big Van Vader for the World Title in 1994 in this very arena. Sting says he wants to give an update on Jeff Hardy: he says he’s doing fine and will be find when we get to Against All Odds. And since that PPV is coming up quickly, the main event will be a four way between Roode, Bubba, Storm, and Hardy. Storm says he wants Bubba and Roode tonight, so Sting says he’s going to get both of them tonight, starting with Roode and ending with Bully Ray.

-Commercial Break-

Garett Bischoff is walking around backstage telling his trainer that he’s here and he’ll see whoever it is when he gets there. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Wow, you have to be very clueless to not know who it is. I knew it without looking it up and it is a complete waste of his starpower.))

Buckingham Brawl: Samoa Joe & Brutus Magnus vs. Matt Morgan & Crimson

The match starts out with a coin toss: the winning team can both stay in the ring without having to make tags, and the loser has to go by standard tag team rules. Crimson starts out the match for the tag champions Joe and Magnus go right after Morgan and knock him off the apron before laying Crimson out with an inverted atomic drop/big boot/senton combo. The two gang up onCrimson over in the corner, and Crimson tries to fire back but gets his head taken off by a lariat from Magnus and Joe follows up with a leaping kneedrop for two. Crimson finally manages to move out of the way of Joe, suplex Magnus, and finally tag out to Morgan. Morgan cleans house and hits a fallaway slam on Magnus, then dumps Joe to the floor and hits a side suplex on Magnus for two. Joe is back in but Crimson spears him and they go out to the floor as Morgan flattens Magnus with a clothesline. Morgan sets up for the Carbon Footprint but Magnus ducks and Morgan lands on the top rope, then Joe and Magnus hit the running knee/snapmare/elbowdrop and get the win.

Winners by Pinfall: Samoa Joe & Brutus Magnus

The crowd cheered for the win and their hometown guy Magnus as they celebrated. Taz notes that that win could make them the Number One contenders. Not that there’s any other teams in Impact Wrestling anyways. ((Jarrett’s Jab – I knew this match was going to suck the minute they introduced a coin toss. I don’t get why we couldn’t get a standard tag match. Don’t get me wrong, the action was great and kept me interested, but the stipulation was eye rolling.))

Eric Bischoff is shown walking into the arena and we are told that Bischoff will confront Garrett tonight.

-Commercial Break-

Eric Bischoff makes his entrance into the Webley Arena to a standing boo and gets flipped off on his way to the ring. Bischoff said he thought that Britians were supposed to be civilized. Bischoff states that we’ve all followed the last few weeks as Garett has lived his fantasy about becoming a pro wrestler and trying to become half the man he is. He’s here tonight to burst that bubble with a good shot of reality, so he wants Garett to come to the ring. Garett comes out and Eric says it’s okay to have goals, but his goals became a fantasy, and to think for a second that he can get a trainer to bring him to higher levels, it’s just a sad waste of time because they both know it’s never going to happen. The trainer’s a coward, he’ll never step in the ring to back him up, it was a bad choice, and he’s disappointed in Garett. Garett’s sad he’s upset about his choice, but if he has a problem, he can tell the guy himself. Eric says we all know he’s never going to come to London to back him up or help anybody. Garett cuts the promo off to take a phone call, and Eric looks really amused, but Garett says when he’s right he’s right…but when he’s wrong, he’s dead wrong because he’s here, he’s in the building, and he wants to see Eric right here tonight. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Please god let this be over soon. I’m not on the Garrett Bischoff bandwagon and I’m not a fan of David Flair 2.0. He doesn’t have the talent that Gunner has, and shoving him down the viewers throats is going to backfire in her face. ))

-Commercial Break-

A video package about Mark Haskins plays. He’s wrestled all over the world and we’re in his house tonight and he’s on a level the other guys in the X Division aren’t.

X Division Champion Austin Aries vs. Mark Haskins

Aries quickly takes Haskins down and outwrestles him to get the crowd chanting for him. Then Haskins takes Aries down and goes through the exact same sequence, to a round of boos from his hometown crowd. Aries with a knee to the midsection and tries to dump Haskins to the floor, but Haskins skins the cat into a flying headscissors and hits a series of moves. Haskins tries to dumps Aries to the floor and now Aries tries to skin the cat, but Haskins dropkicks him to the floor. Haskins goes for a springboard move, but Aries shoves him off and Haskins shish kebabs himself on the top rope before being knocked to the floor by Aries. Aries comes off the top with a shot to Haskins on the floor as the crowd goes nuts for him, and he rolls Haskins back in and hits a slingshot senton and an elbowdrop off the ropes for two. Aries puts Haskins on the top rope and Haskins fights him off, but Aries again shakes the ropes and crotches Haskins on the top rope. Aries goes for the IED, but Haskins moves out of the way and starts a fiery comeback. He hits a monkey flip, Aries blocks a second one, but he follows right up with a crossbody out of the corner for two. Haskins with an Ace Crusher for two then he goes to the top again and goes for a shooting star press, but Aries moves and Haskins has the scariest landing of all time, landing on his forehead. Aries quickly hits a brainbuster and gets the Last Chancery and Haskins taps.

Winner: Austin Aries

((Jarrett’s Jab – Dear God…I hope that he didn’t break his neck with that landing))

-Commercial Break-

Eric Bischoff is on his cell phone backstage trying to call for a cab, but Sting comes out to cut his phone call short and tell him to relax since Garett’s trainer won’t be here tonight…right? Besides, there’s a show to do, so he shows Eric back inside as we head back out to the ring.

TNA World Heavyweight Champion Robert Roode vs. “Cowboy” James Storm

After tying up, Roode comes off the ropes and gets a shoulderblock, but Storm comes back with a hiptoss, bodyslam, elbowdrop, and a legdrop for a two count. Storm goes for the Last Call but Roode bails out to the floor for a breather.

-Commercial Break-

We’re back and Storm is working Roode over in the corner, but comes off the ropes right into a running knee to the gut from Roode. Roode continues working over Storm’s midsection with shoulderblocks in the corner, followed by a running shoulderblock to the gut and a gourdbuster for two. Roode rakes the back and continues kicking at Storm’s abdomen, Storm tries to fire back but Roode ducks a shot and picks Storm up in a fireman’s carry for an inverted F5 that gets two. Roode with the Bret Hart stomp to the lower abdomen and then goes to a bearhug on the mat. Storm fights his way to his feet as the camera pulls back and you see that TNA packed a lot of people in here. Storm escapes and comes off the ropes, Roode goes for the knee to the gut again but Storm dives past him and gets a schoolboy rollup for only two. They go toe to toe in the middle of the ring, Roode with a kick to the gut and then he goes to the second rope but Storm cracks him with a right hand to the jaw and hits a top rope Frankensteiner. Storm takes control with a series of clotheslines and a running forearm. Storm with a lungblower and then he goes to the top rope and comes off with a flying elbow for a two count. Roode catches Storm out of nowhere with the Crossface, but Storm rolls through the move and gets to the ropes. Roode with a straight kick to Storm’s ribs and goes for the Perfectplex, Storm escapes and goes for the Eye of the Storm, but his midsection’s too badly hurt and he drops Roode. Roode hits the Perfectplex but only gets two, so he goes outside the ring and gets the title belt, then brings it into the ring. He shoves the referee out of the way but Storm comes out of nowhere with Closing Time (a.k.a. The Codebreaker.) He sets for the Last Call but Bully Ray comes running out and grabs Storm ankle to keep him from hitting the move. The interference gave Roode just enough time to hit a spear and get the win.

Winner: Robert Roode

Roode lays the belt in the middle of the ring so Bubba can hit a Rock Bottom onto the belt. Sting runs out to make the save as Roode and Bubba bail out to the floor. Storm’s still got one match to go, and Sting tells Rode he’s going to keep his eye on him. ((Jarrett’s Jab – How stupid is this company? Sure it was a great match, but this could easily main event Lockdown in two months in Nashville, and you gave it away on FREE TV. The worst part is that it wasn’t even the main event.))

-Commercial Break-

Knockouts Champion Gail Kim vs. Tara

Tara overwhelms Gail to start, slams her, takes her shirt off, and hits a standing moonsault for two. Madison grabs Tara’s ankle from the outside and Gail to spear her in the corner.  Slumping Tara on the second rope, Gail hits her with a vertical splash. She follows that up with a leaping clothesline to the back and a running knee to the back for a two count. Gail goes for another fall and again gets two. Gail hits a stiff clothesline and plays to the crowd instead of going for the pin. Gail plays with Tara, shoving her around before hitting a hard kick to the back and getting a Dragon sleeper. Tara snapmares out of the hold, but Gail hits another hard kick and a neckbreaker. Gail comes off the top with a back senton, but Tara moves and Gail hits hard. Tara with right hands and a snap suplex, then a BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK BODYDROP. Tara with a snap powerslam and Madison gets up on the apron, but Tara goes and slugs her. Madison sneaks in and tries to hit Tara from behind, but Tara sees her coming and moves, and Madison hits Gail. Tara dumps Madison to the floor and hits the Widow’s Peak to get the win.

Winner by Pinfall: Tara

Tara celebrates and Taz talks about how huge of a victory it is. ((Jarrett’s Jab – I think this is the first time that Gail has lost by Pinfall since she’s redebuted in TNA. I could be wrong though))

Garett Bischoff is backstage, and Tenay hypes finding out who his trainer is next!

-Commercial Break-

Garett Bischoff comes out to the ring and thanks the fans for being so supportive through his time in the business so far, and he’s about to introduce his trainer when Eric Bischoff comes out with Gunner. Eric says they’ve got eyes everywhere and they know he’s not here, so he should give it up before he gets hurt. Apparently Eric wasn’t looking that hard because here comes the Hulkster, looking as orange as ever. Hogan celebrates his return by beating up Gunner and then ping ponging him between Hogan and Garett. Gunner rolls to the outside and then Hogan and Garett turn their attention to Eric, but Gunner drags Eric to the floor to save his neck. Hogan and Garett shake hands as Eric and Gunner head to the back while looking mad.

-Commercial Break-

We go backstage to Hogan and Garett, and Hogan says that Eric Bischoff knows he has a target on his back, and what better way to drive it home by having all the fans in England tell him what they think of him? He tries to incite the fans to riot by saying how great it would be to attack him in a mob assault, and Garett says it was great to see the look on his father’s face because it was like someone walked over his grave. Hogan makes fun of Eric’s tiny soldier, then says how great it is to be back in England because it’s been 18 years, but the fans are as ravenous as ever. TNA is this close to being the best in the world, and he knows they can get there because they’re doing everything right. ((Jarrett’s Jab – I honestly couldn’t care less about Hogan competing or Garett Bischoff if I tried.))

Bully Ray vs. “Cowboy” James Storm

Bubba asks Storm how his ribs are, then tells him he’s going to break his ribs, but ducks through the ropes when Storm goes after him. They head into the corner where Bubba opens him up so he can gently slap Storm on the ribs to get in his head. Storm spits in his face and fires off some right hands and hits a backbody drop, but Bubba with a kick to the ribs and Storm goes down in a heap. Bubba takes free shots at Storm’s ribs and picks him up for a suplex, but drops him gut first on the top rope, then stands right on Storm’s chest. Bubba with a camel clutch and fishhooks his mouth, then stands up and drops all his weight on Storm’s back before tearing the bandages off of Storm’s ribs. Bubba with a big bodyslam as Robert Roode wanders out to ringside to give Bubba a thumbs up to lead into commercial.

-Commercial Break-

We’re back, and Sting wanders out to the ring but, instead of the standard baseball bat, Sting’s got a eletrical tape covered cricket bat over his shoulder. Bubba gets Storm in a side bearhug which is actually more effective for working over the ribs, but Storm boxes his ears repeatedly to get out of the hold. Storm comes off the ropes, but runs right into a big boot from Bubba, who turns to Sting and says that one was for him. Bubba with a pair of elbowdrops for two, then kneels on Storm’s back while pulling his arm up at an awkward angle. Storm fires back but Bubba yanks him down to the mat by the hair as Roode smiles at ringside. Bubba with what I can only call the People’s Big Splash for two, then yells back at fans for chanting Devon’s name at him. Bubba nails a hard chop in the corner and a big vertical suplex, then he comes off the second rope with a senton, but Storm moves out of the way and it looks like the momentum has shifted. Storm starts firing off right hands at Bubba, then hits a series of clotheslines. Storm snaps Bubba’s neck down on the top rope and comes off the top rope with a crossbody, but only gets two. He should have sold the impact of that move a little more. Bubba catches Storm coming off the ropes with a side suplex for two, but then the both of them and the referee all collide in the corner and everyone’s down. Roode tries to get in the ring to interfere, but Sting comes in and chases him off. Roode backs down as Storm and Bubba make it back to their feet and Storm hits the Last Call for the win.

Winner by Pinfall: “Cowboy”James Storm

Bully Ray looks on shocked as Bobby Roode backs his way up the ramp to cut to credits.

((Jarrett’s Jab – Great show in the United Kingdom. Hopefully the Carter family will realize how vital these TV tapings outside the Impact Zone are and allow more of them. I’m also glad they didn’t use the video wall. I’m a fan of Pay-Per-Views looking different than free TV. Next week is the “Star Wars” themed Impact. I’m not sure what that is yet, but I’m hoping it involves someone getting sliced by a lightsaber, or R2-D2 trashing Verizon Wireless.))