TNA iMPACT! Results (10/14): “THEY HAVE ARRIVED!!!”

Source: TNAstars.com

Opening Segment

Eric Bischoff is outside and with Dixie’s attorney, Guy Blake. He says that was a different contract that he sent for Dixie to sign. He accuses Eric of changing the contracts and Eric says that is a serious accusation. The attorney says that Dixie signed the contracts under false pretenses and those weren’t the contracts she was supposed to sign. Eric says that Dixie signed the contracts in front of millions of people on television. He also says that if they want to take it to court, he will see him in five or six years when it gets in front of a jury. Eric says that this is his building and his show. Eric says that the attorney is trespassing. The attorney says that he hasn’t seen the last of him and it isn’t over.

Hulk’s music plays as Bischoff and Hulk (On crutches) come out and Bischoff bows down to Hulk and Hulk plays Crutch Air Guitar. Tenay states that Hogan and Bischoff own the majority share of TNA and Dixie is the former TNA President. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Hogan turns heel and he gets a new shirt? Seriously? Why doesn’t TNA make me a shirt for just being me?))

Eric has a mic and he wants to have the honor and privilege of introducing his mentor and his brother, the man who made this industry famous . . . Hulk Hogan.

Hogan wants to know where that no good Dixie Carter is. He says that he would like to welcome all of the TNA Maniacs to his company. He says that they decided enough of the ga-ga and it was time to take what was theirs. Hogan says that there is a motive to this madness. They tried to do it the easy way but Dixie didn’t want to do it the easy way. Dixie conned her to come to TNA and she promised him the keys to the car. She promised to take all of his ideas to take TNA to the next level, but Dixie didn’t want to do it the easy way so she took and grabbed everything that was promised to him and made it ours. It is now a company of Hollywood Hogan’s Immortals. With them at the helm this company is going to live forever. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Wonder how many “YOU RAN WCW IN THE GROUND” comments will be plastered on the internet tomorrow?))

Eric says that has a great ring to it. Eric says that what they did would be considered a hostile takeover, but this was a work of art. He says that Rembrandt and Monet couldn’t conceive a piece of art as beautiful as they created. Most people didn’t see it coming and didn’t have a clue. He says that most of the people in the company were like deer in headlights. It started with Abyss. People wondered why after Abyss was taken under Hogan’s wing and was given the Hall of Fame ring, why would Abyss turn on Hogan after having the torch passed to him? Only they knew why it happened. It made all of the sense in the world for them. Bischoff brings out the first domino to fall and the biggest one.

Abyss comes to the ring and he has Janice with him. Hogan welcomes his son and Abyss says ‘THEY’RE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE!!!’ For months he prophesized that on 10/10/10 they would come to take total control of TNA. All of the ignorant sheep in the Impact Zone, at home, and in the back didn’t believe him. He says that they are in control of TNA. He says that he is their soldier and he follows their orders. He says that he will destroy anything or anyone who stands in their way. Hogan tells his son that it is his destiny now that he will live forever because he is immortal.

Bischoff says that the next person was someone they did not see eye to eye with but they are the same. It is a person who knew where all of the bodies were buried. Eric brings out the founder of TNA, Jeff Jarrett.

Jeff comes to the ring and he hugs Hogan and Bischoff. Jarrett says that it was genius. Jarrett says that when Dixie Carter took a company that he started and founded right out from under his nose. She used daddy’s money to run him out of his own office. It has been a pleasure to work with Eric Bischoff and a joy to work with the Immortal One. They gave the entire Carter family exactly what they deserved. Now everybody in TNA . . . and he means everybody has to play by the new rules. Those rules are dictated by the new regime.

Fortune’s music plays and they walk down the ramp. SoCal Val by holding the ropes open for them. They stare each other down and Flair says that in Hogan’s absence he hasn’t been watching the show. Flair says that this company is run by Fortune. They are the heart and soul, the blood and guts. He says that Hogan’s guys don’t run the company. Flair says that for twenty-five years they have hated each other’s guts. By the end of tonight, someone is going to walk away. Hogan suggests that they go at it tonight and Flair takes off the jacket and he is ready for a fight. Bischoff and Jarrett try to hold Hogan off but instead, Hogan and Flair hug. Bischoff says that Hogan and Flair are on the same time because Dixie brought in a bunch of used garbage that she compared to Flair and Hogan. Bischoff says that it was a nail in her coffin. Hogan says that the greatest wrestler of all time, Ric Flair, had to be involved to make this plan work. Flair says that he loved this more than his ex-wifes.

Eric says that this new regime wouldn’t be together if not for this next person. Eric introduces the current TNA World Champion, Jeff Hardy.

Jeff hugs Hogan and shakes some of the people’s hands in the ring. The fans chant that Jeff ‘sold out’ before he talks. Jeff says that he didn’t sell out, he sold in. Popularity doesn’t mean a damn thing to him. Jeff says that he blames everyone and the cheers for his pain. He blames their greed for his anger. Jeff says that these people care about him more than the fans. They care about his well being. He says that Van Dam is another politician. Hardy says that he never played that game and he never will. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Aren’t you playing that game now?)) Hardy says that the Whole F’n Show is wondering what the Whole F’n Deal is. Hardy says that he is responsible for Abyss attacking Van Dam and it was needed to get Van Dam out of the picture. Hardy says that they are immortal and they will live forever.

We see Sting and Kevin Nash watching all of this on a television in the back. Eric says that the party is here in the ring and he tells them to come to the ring and stop acting like a couple of wallflowers. Hogan says to let bygones be bygones and forgive and forget. Hogan says that they have two empty seats at the table for them.

“Former” TNA President Dixie Carter walks into the building telling security not to leave her side tonight.

Eric says that they are gloating and a little over the top. Eric says that this is a company and it is about money. Eric says that it is a new day and they want Sting and Nash on the team and they are welcome to join them.

Nash says that it is almost a perfect fit for him. He says that his entire career has been about money. He hasn’t cared about anybody else. He didn’t care if they starved or lost the roof over their head. On the way to getting here, as he got older, he got wiser. The bible says that gray hair is a sign of wisdom. With wisdom came compassion. Those guys in the back that he would have taken every dollar from in the past are his friends now. They are his family so he is going to pass on the money this time. He says that he wants nothing to do with these guys and if they are going to run the company into the ground, they can do it without him.

Sting says that this was not what he came to this company for five years ago. He says that he loved TNA and he wouldn’t have sacrificed his body so much if he didn’t love TNA. Sting says that this is a no win situation. He says that he is not going to repeat history. Sting and Nash leave the ring and Bischoff asks them if they are nuts because it is always about money and power. Eric says that they are handing it to them on a silver platter. While Team Hogan talk in the ring, Taz and Tenay talk about the decision made by Sting and Nash.

We go to the back and we see D’Angelo Dinero confronting Sting and Nash about walking out when they finally set the sides. Dinero says that he is still making money and he is going to take on Sting and Nash’s cause even if he has to do it himself. Dixie wants to know what Nash and Sting are doing. She says that they can’t leave her. Sting says that they tried to tell her before but she did not listen. Dixie says that they were talking in tongues and in cryptic messages. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Remember when Sting was about to tell you, and then Bischoff magically appeared in the rafters and you suspended Sting…))

Hogan and Bischoff walk up to Dixie and Dixie wants to know what they are doing. Dixie slaps Bischoff before he can talk. She wants Hogan to look her in the eye to tell her that he is screwing her out of the company. Hogan tells Dixie that if they are going to talk about this, it will happen in his office.

We are in Hogan’s office and Dixie wants to know if Hogan intentionally tried to screw her. Hogan says that he screwed her out of her company. Dixie wants to know why. Hogan says that Dixie said that he would be the happiest ever. Hogan says that when people want to talk with him, they talk. Hogan says that in thirty years in the business. Dixie says that she gave him the opportunity. She tells Hogan that he isn’t getting this company. Dixie blames Bischoff for this. Dixie says that she never trusted him.

Dixie says that it will be their company over her dead body. She calls Eric a smug **** and she wants them out of here. Dixie and Hogan argue over who controls the security and they force Dixie out of the office. Serge comes up from behind and he gets punched while trying to protect his wife.

J-Woww has arrived at the Impact Zone in a shiny white BMW.

Taz and Tenay talk about how Dixie must feel after being kicked out of the building.

Madison Rayne comes out with a referee. We see footage from Bound for Glory when Tara won the Knockouts Title.

Madison has a microphone and she says that last Sunday night was the biggest night in professional wrestling. It was the biggest pay per view of the year and she had a plan. That plan involved her becoming the three time TNA Knockouts Champion. That didn’t happen because her title is around the waist of Tara. The same Tara who has her to thank for getting her job back in TNA. She demands that Tara come back to the ring and give her what she deserves . . . a Knockouts Title Match right now.

Tara’s music plays and she comes out to the ring.

Madison reminds Tara that she is the reason why she is back in TNA. Madison signed the contract to let her wrestle again. Madison is the reason why Tara was in the match and she owes her. Madison says that they had a deal and she tells Tara to do the right thing.

Tara gives the referee the title belt and then she

Match Number One: Tara (c) vs. Madison Rayne for the Knockouts Title

Tara lays down and Madison gets the three count.

Winner: Madison Rayne

After the match, Madison celebrates with Tara acting as if she did something monumental. Madison says that she did it. She tells Tara that she has to give her credit because she knows that was the toughest match . . .

Mickie James interrupts and she says that she calls herself a champion. She finds that disgraceful, not just for her but for anyone who has ever held a title. Mickie tells Madison to shut up. She says that is making a mockery of a championship. Mickie says that she sees no better time to take the Knockouts Title than right now.

Mickie comes to the ring and Mickie punches Tara but Tara with a knee. Mickie nails a back kick and Madison leaves the ring. Mickie holds up the title belt.

We go to the back where Angelina Love, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich are getting made up and J Woww enters. They hug and  J Woww says that she is looking for Cookie. She says that this should be her last night here.

We are back and the Beautiful People and J Woww are looking for Cookie. Eric Young sees them and he cannot believe that she is there. He wants her to sign his jugs with her Herbie Hancock. Orlando Jordan says that she looks fabulous and would like to put his lollipop in her mouth. She refuses, steps on the lollipop and they walk away. Jordan says that he hates Jersey Shore and Young says he thinks she likes him.

Kurt Angle comes to the ring and he is going to address the Impact Zone and people watching at home.

Angle says that he came to the Impact Zone a little late tonight and he was uninvited. He says that before he makes his statement of retirement. He would like to get a few things off his chest. He appreciates the chants of ‘Please don’t go’ but he is a man of his word. He says that he busted his ass for six months. At Bound for Glory he busted his ribs and reinjured his neck. He got stitches in his eye. Angle wants to know why Bischoff and Hogan screwed him at Bound for Glory. Angle says that he doesn’t expect them to come out, but if he is going to retire, he wants some answers.

Angle says that he didn’t win the title at Bound for Glory, but he didn’t get pinned. Angle tells Hogan and Bischoff that he is in a dilemma.

Jeff Jarrett comes out and asks Kurt what dilemma there is. Angle said that if he did not win the TNA title, he won’t wrestle any more. Since Angle didn’t win the title, he shouldn’t wrestle any more. He didn’t hear Angle say if he didn’t get pinned or got screwed. He didn’t expect Angle to come out and make excuses. He says that Angle was a 1996 Olympic Gold Medalist, father, and husband . . . make that ex-husband. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Oooooo…..))  Jarrett reminds Angle that he will never forget the living hell that he made of his life when he brought Angle into TNA. Now he is looking forward to returning the favor.

Angle tells Jarrett that he can have his ex-wife. Angle wants to know how he made Jarrett’s life a living hell. By putting TNA on the map? By talking up TNA every time he could? By teaching the rookies everything he knows? Was it because it wasn’t all about Jarrett after Angle got here? Angle asks Jeff how many titles he won before he got here. Angle says that Jarrett held everyone down, but Jeff couldn’t hold Angle down. ((Jarrett’s Jab – Some “anonymous” caller on the Bubba the Love Sponge show did cost him his job for a while))

Jeff says that had nothing to do with it. Jeff says that it is all about getting back what was his. Joining forces with Hogan and Bischoff was the golden ticket. Destroying Angle’s career was more important than taking Angle’s life from him.

Angle goes up the ramp to go after Jarrett, but Gunner and Murphy attack Angle and they cuff him while Jarrett kicks him. Jarrett punches Angle and then he sends Angle into the stage. Jarrett punches Angle and Taz leaves the announce table and he tells Jeff that is enough.

We are back with a Moments Ago with the attack by Jeff Jarrett on Kurt Angle.

We go to an interview that Samoa Joe did at Daytona Beach on Monday where he says that he made the mistake of trusting Jeff Jarrett at Bound for Glory. Joe says that Jeff chose him for a reason and a purpose. That was to destroy everyone put in front of him. Joe says that man is now looking for him.

Match Number Two(?): Abyss versus Samoa Joe

Joe punches Abyss and Abyss cowers in the corner until the referee pulls Joe away. Abyss sends Joe into the corner but Abyss misses a charge and Joe with an enzuigiri. Joe with boots to the head and then he hits a leaping kick followed by a back senton. Joe with punches to Abyss but Abyss grabs Joe by the throat and he hits a choke slam. Abyss goes to the floor and he takes SoCal Val’s chair as she runs away. Joe with a suicide dive and Joe clips the chair but he hits Abyss as well. Abyss gets the ring bell and hits Joe with it.

The referee calls for the bell and after Abyss gives the bell back it is rung.

Winner by disqualification: Samoa Joe

After the match Abyss brings Joe back into the ring and he punches Joe in the head and Joe is busted open.  Rob Van Dam’s music plays and Abyss leaves the ring.

Rob Van Dam gets on the mic ((Jarrett’s Jab – I think this is a talking show instead of a wrestling show to be honest so far)). Rob wants Jeff Hardy to come out to get this resolved. Rob says that Jeff owes the fans an explanation. Rob tells Jeff that he had his respect, trust, and support. Now he has his focus.

Jeff Hardy appears on the HoganTron ((Jarrett’s Jab – Or is the BrotherTron?)) and he says that you devour your friends when you bring them close. He chewed on Rob and spit him out. His words are biblical. Some refer to him as the new anti-Christ of wrestling. ((Jarrett’s Jab – And some people rant and complain that TNA sucks, doesn’t mean it’s true.))

Eric Bischoff’s music plays and he comes out to the ring. Eric says that there are dilemmas. He has a solution for Rob. Eric tells Rob that if he wants a shot at Jeff Hardy at Turning Point. Only if Rob can beat Ken Anderson in the main event tonight with the winner getting the title match at Turning Point. Rob wants Anderson to come out so he can kick Jeff Hardy’s ass.

We are back and Eric is impressed with Miss Tessmacher’s pearl necklace and he wants to talk about things after the show. Eric says that it is that easy with her and that Pope and Nash know how easy she is. She shared information that she shouldn’t have shared. Eric says that she isn’t thinking with her head. Eric says that they are done. She has one option and that is to get in the ring with the Knockouts. She isn’t running things for the Knockouts any more. Eric tells her to get her 38DDs out of his sight. She storms off and Ken Anderson comes up behind Eric Bischoff. Ken shakes Eric’s hand and says that he says that he never thought he would meet a bigger a**hole than him. He calls Eric a d-bag and then he shakes Eric’s hand really hard and Ken says that Eric won’t win the war. Ken leaves and Bischoff calls him a Son of a B—h. ((Jarrett’s Jab – I believe the term is a**hole Eric.))

Match Number Three: D’Angelo Dinero versus Fortune (Douglas Williams, Beer Money, Kazarian, and A.J. Styles)

Williams is the first to face Dinero and they lock up and Williams backs Dinero into the corner. Dinero hits some punches but Williams connects with  a knee and shoulder tackle. Dinero connects with a flying forearm followed by elbows and a punch to the head and gets a near fall. Kazarian tags in and he gets back body dropped. Dinero nails a reverse atomic drop and flying shoulder tackle on Kazarian. Styles tags in and he gets punched and then Dinero hits a splash and goes to the floor. Dinero punches Flair but he turns around and gets the Carbon Footprint from Morgan. Styles picks up Dinero on the two count. Roode tags in and he punches Dinero and chops him. Roode connects with a knee and elbow and then he tags in Storm and they hit a double suplex. Kazarian tags in and hits a drop kick and gets a near fall. Kazarian gets an Irish whip and Dinero knocks everyone off the apron. Styles hits Frankie with a Pele kick and then Dinero gets a rollup on Kazarian. Beer Money hits the DWI and then Kazarian gets the three count.

Winners by Pinfall: Beer Money, A.J. Styles, Douglas Williams, and Frankie Kazarian

Robbie E and Cookie are walking in the back. Now J Woww walking with Lacey, Velvet, and Angelina.

We are back and Cookie and Robbie E come to the ring. They have mics and Robbie says that he has something crazy to tell her. He says that they are on at the same time as the Jersey Shore and he says sorry because after Robbie E and Cookie debuted last week, nobody wants to watch those fake punks. They want to watch them. He says that Jersey Shore is done. Cookie says that the Jersey Shore poseurs are done. Cookie calls J Woww ‘J Cow’.

J Woww comes to the ring with Angelina Love, Velvet Sky, and Lacey Von Erich. Taz states she fits right in with the BP’s.  J Woww gets in Cookie’s face and Cookie calls her a poseur and J Cow. Cookie talks slowly and she tells her to take her fake weave and funbags and crawl back into the hole she came from.

Cookie slaps J Woww and J Woww takes her down and she slams Cookie’s head into the mat as she punches her. Robbie is having crotchticular problems courtesy of Angelina, Velvet, and Lacey.

We are back with a Moments Ago Moment of the battle between J Woww and Cookie.

It is now time to take a look back at what happened in the first half hour of the show. ((Jarrett’s Jab – As if forty minutes of the original airing wasn’t enough))

Ken Anderson is walking in the back and now he is stretching as he gets ready for his match with Rob Van Dam. Ken Anderson comes out and he isn’t going to use his mic to talk to the crowd because he is all about business.

RVD is shown in the back walking toward the curtain and his entrance.

Match Number Four: Rob Van Dam versus Ken Anderson in a Number One Contender Match

Anderson and Van Dam stand in the center of the ring and then Anderson punches Van Dam but Van Dam punches back. They exchange more punches. Anderson connects with a chop but Van Dam gets a kick and a spin kick. Van Dam hits a shoulder in the corner. Anderson punches Van Dam but Van Dam with an Irish whip and monkey flip. Van Dam with a running heel kick and he gets a near fall. Anderson goes to the floor and Van Dam nails a moonsault from the apron.

We move to Reaction and the match continues with Van Dam rolling Anderson back in but Anderson hits the ropes and it crotches Van Dam. Van Dam knocks Anderson to the mat but Anderson crotches Van Dam again. Anderson gets a superplex and he gets a near fall. Anderson kicks Van Dam in the head and he connects with a back elbow for a near fall. Anderson gets some cross faces to the head and then he applies a reverse chin lock. Anderson hits a knee and he gets a near fall. Anderson slams Van Dam’s head into the turnbuckles and then he kicks Van Dam. Anderson pulls Van Dam out of the corner to work on the back some more. Van Dam connects with punches, a clothesline, and a savate kick. Anderson gets Van Dam on his shoulders but Van Dam with a slam and a split legged moonsault for a near fall. Anderson hits the rolling fireman’s carry slam but he can only get a two count.

Anderson goes up top for the Kenton Bomb but he misses when Rob moves out of the way. Van Dam goes up top for the Five Star Frog Splash but he hits Anderson’s knees.

Both men are down and Eric Bischoff to come to the ring. He has something to say to the referee. He whispers something in Brian Hebner’s ear and Hebner leaves with Eric. Eric tells him to do his job as they go to the back.

Jeff Hardy comes to the ring with a chair and he hits Van Dam and Anderson in the back with the chair. Hardy puts the chair on Anderson’s arm and he hits a Twist of Fate onto the chair.

No Contest