Credit: 411mania.com
-We get a wacky Independence Day video to begin the show.
-JR and Foley welcome us to the show, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA~!
~THE V.I.P. LOUNGE~
MVP is set for the VIP lounge, big things poppin, little things stopping! The VIP lounge is for people better than you, and he will set this show off with a BIG deal. His guest is better than most, one of the greatest in the history of the WWE. He has 12-world titles to support that. The Cerebral Assassin, the King of Kings, the Game, HHH!
HHH makes his way to the ring, and takes his time doing the full entrance and posing for everyone. MVP gets a haircut and a shave, and then begins to eat dinner as HHH finishes up. HHH is now done, they catch a seat on the leather couch as MVP says HHH did well by defeating John Cena at Night of Champions. MVP also wants to welcome the Game to Smackdown. MVP puts over the VIP Lounge as the highest segment on the show. HHH admits that he is a big fan of MVP, his dress, his bling, it’s big time. He even digs that power ranger outfit he wears in the ring. Seriously, he likes it and that’s why the kids love MVP. MVP says it is cutting edge technology, like the Olympians wear. HHH says he better be careful because he could get busted for performance enhancing, and that could lead to a call from Dr. Black and that’s 30-days. MVP says he makes more money and HHH says he would rather be a 12-time champion than be known as the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history. HHH wanted to be on the show, and has some special footage for MVP. HHH assures him that he’ll get full credit for it. They argue over who gets to start the footage, and it is footage of Edge getting his ass handed to him and losing the World Title as well as Punk defending the title in the main event. HHH then says it is safe to say that Edge got Punk’d Out. MVP then says Edge had his Punk card pulled. They trade jokes until…
“EXCUSE ME…EXCUSE ME” Vickie Guerrero comes out. She IS the general manager. HHH says he knows who she is, and then says he wanted to meet her. Congrats on the upcoming wedding. That fiancée is a genius, marrying the boss to get ahead in business, who thinks up that kind of stuff? If the stress of the wedding is too much, you should just get in the car and go to Vegas. HHH Knows a GREAT place, and it is drive through and you don’t even have to be awake for it. Tremendous. Vickie gets annoyed as she tried to talk, and says Edge has done stuff that HHH will never do. Successfully defended the title every time he fought Batista and the only man to BANISH the Undertaker from WWE. HHH agrees, and says looking at her, there are a lot of things Edge would do that he would never do. Just that, he has seen some of the chicks Edge has dated, and Vickie is a BIG step up. She advises them to change their tune, because when Edge arrived, he will NOT be happy. Vickie then says at the Great American Bash HHH will defend the WWE Title against Edge.
-They show the new DIVAS’S title, which looks like a fucking tramp stamp.
-Natalya, with new red hair, comes out for some commentary.
STAR ON A POLE MATCH: Victoria vs. Michelle McCool vs. Kelly Kelly vs. Cherry vs. Maryse
The winner will face Natalya Neidhart for the WWE Smackdown Diva’s Championship, at some point.
McCool goes for the star right away, gets stopped and Kelly climbs, but Victoria stops her. As she climbs, Cherry is over to battle her. Up top and a superplex by Cherry. McCool is back in and Maryse sloppily clotheslines her down. Kelly and Cherry give Maryse the electric chair. Victoria climbs, kicks away at McCool but is then pulled off to the floor. Cherry takes out McCool, and she and Kelly battle and exchange forearms. Cherry catapults her into the corner and climbs, but Victoria tosses her down and gets the sling shot leg drop. YAKUZA to Maryse, she then tosses Kelly and climbs again. McCool is back in, goes up and was looking for a RANA, but Kelly tosses them to the floor. That was not well thought out. Maryse tosses Kelly, celebrates and climbs, but McCool is back, tosses her down and wins.
Winner: Michelle McCool @ 3:25 via pin
-Vickie meets with the wedding planner who Edge is so nailing, and THOSE EDGE GUYS come to meet with Vickie. She wants to know what they have to say about Monday. They apologize, but Vickie blames them and is disgusted with them! They will have a match with Jesse and Festus NEXT. GO DO SOMETHING RIGHT!
-Edge arrives and everyone is staring at him. He’s an angry panda.
-JR and Foley discuss Vladimir Kozlov, and we get a video package for “The Moscow Mauler.”
Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins vs. Jesse and Festus
Festus is dressed up like Uncle Sam. Wow. Festus gets angry at the bell, cleans house and snatches up Ryder and tags Jesse, 2nd rope Hart attack on Ryder. He sends Jesse to the apron, and gets dropkicked to the floor. Hawkins works him over, brings him back in and lays the boots to Jesse and covers for 2. Chinlock by Hawkins, Jesse battles out but gets slammed down. To the corner, tag to Ryder and he sends Jesse to the corner, gets a Russian leg sweep and covers for 2. Ryder works a neck crank, into the chinlock and Jesse escapes, gets the tag and Festus is in and starts to lay out Ryder. Irish whip and an ass attack followed by the shoulder block. Nails Hawkins, slams them together and then powerslams Ryder down. Flying biscuit by Festus followed by the flapjack and that is all.
Winners: Jesse and Festus @ 3:45 via pin
-Edge hits the ring while Ryder and Hawkins take out Jesse. Edge is in and SPEARS Festus out of his boots. Festus is now defenseless because the bell has already been sounded. Edge removes his belt and whips Festus as Hawkins and Ryder hold Jesse back. Edge gets a chair and KILLS Festus with a baseball like swing. Jesse checks on Festus as the crowd HATES Edge for this.
-We get replays of the Edge attack.
-Edge meets with Vickie. He can’t relax and Vickie says he has a WWE title match at the Bash. He feels naked right now. Vickie says what happened Monday was stupid, and she didn’t give him permission to be there. Edge gets PISSED and says he needs no such permission. She doesn’t understand that he has been in this business for 16-years. Vickie says SHE is the boss and Edge should be mad at himself, because he is a FOOL!
-We get a video for Jeff Hardy, because he’s up next!
Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison
This should be fun. Lock up and a knee by Morrison. Clubbing shots to the back, uppercuts ad then off the ropes and Jeff gets a shoulder block that takes Morrison down. Lock up and a takedown by Morrison, into the arm bar and hammerlock. Side headlock by Jeff, Morrison counters into the top wristlock but Jeff flips out and tosses Morrison to the floor. Plancha by Jeff is a fake, and then a cross body onto Morrison does connect. Back into the ring, corner mounted shots by Jeff and Morrison is down. Double leg takedown and a leg drop is blocked by Morrison into a sunset flip for 2. Charging knee strike by Morrison levels Jeff and gets him a cover for 2. Kick to the gut by Morrison, kicks to the face and then lays the boots to Jeff. Uppercuts by Morrison keep the control for him, an Irish whip and springboard them misses. Mule kick by Jeff, to the corner and Morrison counters the dropkick and tosses Jeff over the top to the floor. The ref hits the floor to check on Jeff, and we head to commercial @ 3:55.
Back from commercial @ 7:10 as Morrison is in control working the arm. Jeff to his feet, battles out and MISSES the whisper in the wind, Morrison covers for 2. Morrison now drags Jeff to the apron and then kicks him in the face. He then wraps the arm around the ropes, continuing that work and keeping Jeff grounded. Morrison then gets what is basically a stunner on the arm and covers for 2. Morrison goes back to the arm bar, sits back for a cross arm breaker but released. Jeff with a roll up for 2. Morrison takes him back down, then goes back to the arm and snap mares Jeff down and back to the arm bar. Jeff tries to fight back again, but Morrison slams him shoulder first to the steel post. Morrison tosses him down, to the 2nd rope and goes for a RANA, but Jeff gets a sit out powerbomb as a counter! Both men are down, and struggling to their feet. They are up and a forearm by Jeff. A clothesline, and another connect. Russian leg sweep by Jeff, leg drop roll up deal for 2. TOF countered, but Jeff gets the whisper in the wind and covers for 2. Jeff up top now, Morrison up and gets an Enziguri on Jeff and then covers for 2. JR and Foley call it a PELE. Moonlight Drive countered and Jeff gets the gourd buster. Up top now and SWANTON connects! 1…2…3.
Winner: Jeff Hardy @ 12:50 via pin
-We get replays of the match.
-We get a video for Maria. She’s coming to Smackdown.
Funaki vs. Umaga
It’s good to see Funaki still finding work these days. We start with a boot by Funaki to a charging Umaga, but he then gets clotheslined out of his boots so that didn’t mean shit. To the corner, a whip and superkick by Umaga. Umaga drags Funaki to the corner, backs up and kills Funaki with the Samoan Clambake. The Samoan Spike finishes it.
Winner: Umaga @ 1:55 via pin
-Edge and THOSE EDGE GUYS talk backstage. A stage chick comes up and tells Edge that Vickie wants to see him. He goes to her office and he has some attitude. Edge says she wouldn’t have all of this if it wasn’t for him. She didn’t get the job out of ability, and Edge says HE is the real GM of Smackdown. She says she has sacrificed for him, her injured neck and back, she is confined to the wheel chair for the rest of her life. Edge tells her to shut up and says to speak to him in English. She stands up and yells at him to get out. Confined indeed. Edge leaves, and tries to go back in but the door is locked and he asks her to open the door, she doesn’t and Edge starts to hit and kick the door. I hate when true love has such problems.
-We get a Night of Champions video recap.
-Ken Kennedy gets his mic back and gets to do is special entrance.
US TITLE MATCH: Matt Hardy vs. Ken Kennedy vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Chavo Guerrero w/Bam Neeley
Tornado rules here as everyone is in at all times. Chavo and Matt pair off, Kennedy slams Shelton down and then Matt and Kennedy stand off. Lock up and a side headlock by Matt, off the ropes and a shoulder block by Matt, only to eat the cool spin kick by Kennedy. Chavo back in and Kennedy clothesline him, then one for Matt and then a face wash for Chavo. Shelton in with a BIG YAKUZA to Kennedy to stop his momentum. Chavo with a cool head scissors on Shelton, but then gets flap jacked. Shelton goes for a powerbomb, but Chavo rolls him up for 2. They all trade some roll ups, Finlay roll to Shelton by Kennedy and then Matt takes him down, everyone is down and we head to a commercial @ 2:45.
Back from commercial @ 6:15 as Kennedy is in control. Off the ropes and a body attack to Shelton, clothesline to Chavo and then a backdrop. A cover for 2 by Kennedy. Matt up top, Kennedy nails him and crotches him. Kennedy up top and they battle, Shelton over and TOWER OF DOOOOOOM! Chavo tosses Kennedy to the floor, Matt is down and Chavo and Shelton battle, T-BONE by Shelton and he covers Chavo for 2 as Bam puts Chavo’s foot on the ropes. Shelton is pissed, goes to the floor and Chavo starts the three amigos on Matt. Gets two, and then tosses Matt into Shelton. Gets the third and goes up top…Kennedy is back in, up top and gets knocked off. FROG SPLASH to Matt! 1…2…NO Kennedy makes the save. Chavo tosses Kennedy to the floor again, sets up Matt but Matt gets the TOF! Matt covers for two, moves and Shelton leg drops Chavo. Matt tosses Shelton, covers Chavo for 2, moves and Kennedy splashes onto Chavo. Matt tosses Kennedy onto Bam, covers Chavo, but Shelton is in, TOF on Shelton, who landed on Chavo, and Matt covers Chavo for the win.
Winner: Matt Hardy @ 10:25 via
~EDGE PRACTICES CANADIAN RAGE~
Edge comes to the ring with no music, but a lot of anger. He says that this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was the victim of two cowardly attacks. First by Batista, and secondly by CM Punk. The latter cost him HIS world heavyweight championship. It was cowardly, it wasn’t even a match and it shouldn’t have happened. He was a victim, it wasn’t fair to him at all! The only solace he has is that he will challenge for the WWE Title and he will beat HHH and be our WWE champion for a 3rd time.
With that being said, this has been a most difficult week, both professionally and personally. When he walked in here, he felt disrespect form all of us and he has had no support from anyone. Hawkins and Ryder, who he took from nothing and gave everything too should be doing everything to make him happy and they have done nothing. All of you have done nothing. He stands here an island unto himself, a solitary figure. He will battle though because that is what he does. That is why n one likes him, because he has everything we want. He hasn’t even gotten the support from Vickie, the love of his life, his fiance. She should be here more than anyone else, but she locked him out of the office and that should tell you all you need to know about Vickie Guerrero. But if you want more, he has dirty secrets.
Vickie, sans wheel chair is out and asks why he is making all of this public. These people don’t deserve to hear about their private life. He lost his title and apparently his mind as well. She doesn’t understand what he is trying to do. Edge then walks up the ramp to Vickie and says he has one last public statement. THE WEDDING IS OFF! Vickie freaks out and screams and cries as Edge leaves. She takes off the engagement ring and throws it away as she continues to have a mental breakdown.
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