Full Credit: James Caldwell, PWTorch.com
We start with Joey Styles and Tazz introducing the show. Bobby Lashley walked out all smiles. Styles plugged the Tribute to the Troops show next Monday. Lashley opened his promo by saying, “Holy cow.” He thanked the fans for their support since he came to ECW and he said that’s why he came to ECW. Lashley wanted to reflect on Big Show. He said Show’s the biggest, toughest opponent he’s ever had, but if he ever wants a shot at the title again, Show can find it right around his waist. Lashley said he has a big target on his back. He then paused to pull a Batista and “humbly” thank the fans for letting him live his dream. Lashley said fans can pick his title opponent for two weeks from now by voting on WWE.com. He said the choices are Sabu, Test, and RVD. Big cheers for RVD. Lashley said he lives for the challenge, whomever it might be. Lashley then talked about the Tribute to the Troops show. They cut to shots of men standing in the crowd in Army fatigues. Suddenly, Rene Dupree’s music interrupted. Dupree walked out and pandered to Lashley and the fans. He said Lashley’s nothing more than a corporate puppet being run by the man, just like the troops. Dupree said the Tribute to the Troops show was necessary because the troops are getting their ass kicked overseas. Dupree said he’s Lashley’s challenger tonight and he’s going to take a beating just like the troops overseas. Lashley landed a right hand blow to answer Dupree.
1 — LASHLEY vs. RENE DUPREE — ECW Title match
Lashley gave Dupree a belly-to-belly suplex early on. Dupree then recovered in the corner and slipped to the outside for a breather. He caught Lashley by surprise with a neck breaker, then he worked on him on the mat. Lashley made a comeback with a hard forearm blow into a delayed vertical suplex. He speared Dupree in the corner, then hit the Dominator for the win.
WINNER: Lashley in 3:00. The fans were quiet, as Lashley was never in any jeopardy. Lashley needs a quality heel opponent to feud with consistently if this title run is going to mean anything.
[Commercial Break]
Joey Styles waited for his cue to introduce Brad Armstrong at the announce table. They showed clips of Striker kicking Balls in the Mahoney’s last week. Striker stood center ring, then Balls walked into the ring and smashed Striker in the face to start the match.
2 — BALLS MAHONEY vs. MATT STRIKER
Striker and Balls exchanged blows early on. Seriously, Tazz and Brad had a conversation about where Brad is from. Striker went for a charging kick to the face as Balls was seated in the corner, and he gave the move away by clearly slapping his knee to create sound. Striker then choked Balls with his sweater vest. Brad and Tazz exchanged verbal blows as Striker bent Balls’s shoulder backward. “This Balls is nuts,” Brad said as Balls made his comeback. Balls landed Balls punches, then he blocked a kick to the Mahoneys and spun Striker around for a body blow. Balls went up top and missed with a guillotine leg drop. Striker then landed the Golden Rule – a modified rocker dropper – for the win.
WINNER: Striker in 4:00. The crowd clearly showed up expecting Cena-Edge for an hour. No crowd heat through two matches.
Test stood backstage for a promo for Super Cuts. Oh, wait, nevermind. He made his case for why he should face Lashley for the ECW Title on January 2. Test said everyone who goes after him fails. Well, except for that Hunter guy stealing Stephanie at the altar. Test screamed at the fans to vote for him.
[Commercial Break]
RVD stood backstage for his promo. He said everything was so cool last summer when he was ECW champion. RVD told the fans that they should vote for him because he’s the biggest reason why anyone should watch the show.
Hardcore Holly stood center ring with a mic in hand. He paced the ring before they showed footage of Holly being DQ’ed in his match against C.M. Punk last week. There was a brief “You tapped out” chant before Holly said he’s out here to kill rumors of him tapping out to Punk. He said he was beating and beating and beating Punk before the referee stepped in and saved Punk’s life. He called out Punk to see if he could make him tap for real. “Just remember, I’m a weapon and I’ll always be a weapon,” he said. Ooooook. Punk then walked out and looked around the arena like he was searching for someone. Holly said Punk only has three minutes to make him tap out. Or else, what? Holly sends him a fruitcake?
3 — C.M. PUNK vs. HARDCORE HOLLY
Punk went for the Anaconda Vice within the first five seconds, but Holly fought him off. Holly then stomped on Punk in the corner. Punk suddenly dropped Holly on the mat and went for the Vice, but Holly fought him off with forearm blows. Holly hooked Punk in the ropes and landed forearm blows to the top of the chest. Holly went to a rest hold at 2:30 to ground Punk. Punk fought back to his feet and landed a suplex before going for the Vice, but Holly bit Punk’s hands to break the hold. Punk tried to put Holly in the Vice, but time expired. Holly then jumped Punk from behind as Punk complained to the referee. Holly gave Punk the Alabama Slam and left him motionless in the ring.
WINNER: No Contest at 3:00. Including and since the December to Dismember PPV, WWE has been on a mission to make Punk look like a complete fool. Either that or the writers are completely incompetent. Punk was booked as a tweener for weeks and this week, he became the typical gullible babyface. Completely unproductive.
Shannon Moore was on the phone backstage. He said he would take care of something tomorrow when he gets home. Daivari bumped into him and told him to watch out. Daivari said he was going to teach a punk like him a lesson in the ring. Khali walked past Moore, who was standing in front of a strategically placed ladder. Moore just shook his head.
[Commercial Break]
4 — GREAT KHALI (w/Daivari) vs. SHANNON MOORE
Daivari got in Shannon’s face before the match. Khali then snuck up behind Shannon and cornered him before landing a clothesline. He finished off Shannon with a two-hand lift-up slam. Tommy Dreamer then ran to the ringside and ran over Daivari with a chair. The bell sounded, but they didn’t make it clear whether Khali pinned Shannon or whether the referee decided that Dreamer attacking the manager outside of the ring was grounds for calling off the match. Khali ran over Dreamer with a big boot on the outside. He then two-hand slammed Dreamer onto the ring steps. Dreamer gasped for air as he writhed in pain on the steps. Tazz said it might be the demise of Dreamer. Medics and referees checked on Dreamer as someone ringside made odd monkey noises. Khali picked up Daivari and carried him on his shoulders to the back.
WINNER: No official decision in 1:00.
They aired a video package on Sabu instead of him cutting a promo.
Medics brought a gurney to ringside. Styles did his super low voice as they strapped Dreamer to a flat board. Tazz said he’s seen a lot of carnage, but never anything like this. Somehow, I doubt that. The “low voice” by announcers has become so overplayed that it’s reached a comical state of “don’t take this seriously because it’s just an angle.”
[Commercial Break]
Styles and Tazz talked about the voting. A random teenager in the front row stood up and flipped his shirt up to pose for the camera.
They cut to footage from two weeks ago when Mike Knox dumped Kelly Kelly. Mike Knox stood backstage in a suit for a promo after the footage aired. Styles asked Knox for an explanation. He said everyone seems to be talking about this “horrible thing” he did to Kelly two weeks ago. Knox said everyone loves Kelly because she runs around taking off her clothes. He asked the fans to put themselves in Knox’s shoes and asked how they would feel if their girlfriend or wife was taking her clothes off in public and running around with another guy like C.M. Punk. He solemnly said what he did to Kelly hurt him worse than it hurt her. Effective promo. I’m interested to see how they follow up on this.
Sabu, Test, and RVD walked out for a triple threat match. Tazz encouraged the fans to keep voting on WWE.com for who should face Lashley in two weeks. He said tonight’s match would have no bearing on the voting. And with that, thousands of viewers found something better to do. Seriously, what’s the point of the match, then? He could have worded it better to encourage voters to see what each “candidate” brings to the match so they could make a more educated vote. With everyone in the ring, they cut to a break.
[Commercial Break]
5 — ROB VAN DAM vs. TEST vs. SABU
Men were strewn about the floor out of the break. Back in the ring, RVD caught Test in the mouth with a kick. He then came off the top with a crossbody splash. RVD went for a moonsault, but Test shoved him off the top and RVD ate the guardrail. Test and Sabu battled, then RVD returned to the ring and flew off Sabu’s back onto Test in the corner. RVD hit Rolling Thunder on Test, then RVD and Sabu clotheslined Test to the floor. Sabu, with his mouth bleeding, tricked RVD into a leg sweep. RVD came back by crotching Sabu on the ropes and landing a top rope kick to the chest. RVD then hit the Five Star frogsplash on Sabu. Test ran into the ring and threw RVD to the outside to cover Sabu for the win.
RVD came back into the ring after the match and checked on Sabu. Test then entered the ring and said all three men left it in the ring to influence voting. He asked the fans to make their pick. Sabu received barely a reaction. Test was booed. RVD had the most cheers. Tazz asked for a drumroll and they revealed the voting. RVD had 45 percent, Test had 18 percent, and Sabu had 37 percent. Well, I didn’t expect them to reveal the results until next week, especially after the wrestlers only had five minutes to “influence” voting with the main event. What about people who DVR the show or watch delayed on the West Coast? Test jumped RVD from behind after the results were revealed.
WINNER: Test in estimated 5:00. Again, the crowd was pretty quiet here. The match and post-match voting felt rushed and poorly planned out, which tells me upper management has officially lost interest in the ECW brand.
