Livers quiver with anticipation, illness for ‘Great American Bash’

Source: Northwest Arkansas News

Major changes are

in the works for

tonight’s “ Great American Bash” pay-perview after both Bobby Lashley and The Great Khali were pulled from the card due to liver illness. Dave Meltzer reported on the Wrestling Observer Web site Saturday that Khali has a diseased liver and will likely be taken off the road. WWE. com confirmed that Lashley has “ elevated enzymes of the liver” and cannot compete. In my 30-plus years of watching this stuff, I can’t recall anything like this happening. Sure, there have been major changes and shake ups. But never have two performs gone down for organ issues. I don’t know that steroids are a factor in these illnesses but all it takes is one look at either one of these giants to make one ask the question. Hopefully things aren’t too serious. Lashley is on his way to becoming a real breakout star for the WWE. And Khali has been frightening children and muttering nonsense. Meltzer also reported that ECW Champion The Big Show will face The Undertaker in the Punjabi Prison match. That’s good news for the Taker. He’ll actually get a good match out of Big Show. The best he could do against Khali is survive. Topping it all off is Mark Henry’s knee injury from last weekend’s “ Saturday Night’s Main Event” taking him out of a match with Batista. This show was doomed before it started. On that happy note, let’s jump into the “ Great American Bash” edition of Picks from these Parts with yours truly, Nostrildamus: • World Heavyweight Champion Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. King Booker T — Rey’s championship run has been a bumpy ride and it’s about to end at the hands of the one true wrestling King. Hat’ off to Mysterio for working through his injuries while hardly missing a step. Booker’s run with the gold is long over due. While I don’t think it will last all that long — Batista’s waiting in the wings — it should be an entertaining ride. The two had a good warm up on “ Smackdown” Friday. Tonight’s match should be a lot of fun. Winner: King Booker T. • The Undertaker vs. ECW Champion The Big Show, Punjabi Prison match — What is a Punjabi Prison match ? There’s a funny story on WWE. com where veterans of the ring sound off on how brutal and mysterious this match is. But there is never a mention of what it entails. Best I can guess — it’s a creepy looking cage with weapons and stuff in it.

The other, easy answer, is it’s a gimmick WWE creative came up with to keep everybody from seeing just how awful Khali really is.

And now Big Show has to get tossed around in it, like a 500-pound rag doll that sweats a lot. Nice.

Even though he’s a champion, I still say The Big Show takes the fall here. Either that or the entire ECW locker room unloads on the Taker. Neither sounds all that appealing. Winner: The Undertaker.

• Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy — Good for Batista. Bad for Mr. Kennedy. This one shouldn’t take long. And it won’t end pretty for “ Smackdown’s” favorite smarmy bad guy. Winner: Batista.

• WWE Tag Team Champi ons Paul London and Brian Kendrick vs. The Pitbulls — These four have had some good one-on-one encounters over the last few weeks and tonight, given the right amount of time, should be a good one.

Well, good if you like wrestling. The original Pitbulls were a staple in ECW and that’s kind of where I thought the Kid Kash and Jamie Nobles team of the same name would end up. In the end it doesn’t really mater. Just like no title really matters in the WWE. Winner London and Kendrick.

• United States Champion Fit Finlay vs. William Regal — This was suppose to be a three-way with Lashley now it features just King Booker’s Royal Henchmen. Again, given the time — and with all the injuries I can’t see the WWE rushing any match — this could be an oldschool classic. The only reason I purchased the “ Judgment Day” DVD was to see Chris Benoit and Finlay. And it didn’t disappoint. They should toss Matt Hardy into this mix. At least it would give Finaly’s little buddy under the ring something to do. Winner: Finlay.

• Four-way Bra and Panties — This one features Diva Search winner Ashley, Jillian Hall, Kristal and Michelle McCool and lots of cleavage. Forget what I said in that last one about not rushing any matches. Winner: All the dudes.

• Cruiserweight Champion Gregory Helms vs. Super Crazy — I loves me some Super Crazy and nothing would make me happier than to see Crazy take the title. But, I don’t think the title will change hands. Again, it’s not like the championship is portrayed as anything special. Winner: Gregory Helms.

• Rhino, Joe give it away for free on Spike TV This is a pay-per-view caliber match, put on by two of the hottest properties in wrestling today. Samoa Joe and Rhino are arguably two of the most popular wrestlers with the Impact Zone crowd and TNA is smart to showcase these two machines on Thursday’s “ Impact. ” As a fan of the “ sport” of wrestling, I can honestly say TNA is my favorite brand of wrestling. I’ve seen enough Ring of Honor DVD’s to know that if that promotion had a free TV show on cable, I’d love it too. But your other free TV choice is loaded with poop jokes, strippers who can’t dance and giant, no-talent freak shows. Not much of a choice, really. Though I’m no fan of Sting or NWA-TNA World Heavyweight Champion Jeff Jarrett, at least they don’t insult me the way the WWE does. And I also understand the company is trying to draw in as many fans as they can. TNA and Spike TV have invested a lot in Sting, and he’s performed better than could be expected. For some, Sting is the only reason to watch TNA Wrestling. As long as fans are watching, that’s good enough for me. Here’s some other happenings with the grapplings:

• Hulk Hogan returns to “ Raw” Monday night to talk his jive at Randy Orton. Randy laid Hogan out with an RKO on the back of his rental car. Hogan’s lovely daughter Brooke didn’t seem too up set.

• Also on “ Raw, ” Ric Flair faces Intercontinental Champion Johnny Nitro. Look for Mick Foley to continue his feud with Flair. Their war of words has been one of few cool things on Monday nights. I expect this to culminate in a bloody war at next month’s “ SummerSlam. ”

• “ Cowboy” Bob Orton passed away last week. He was the father of Bob Jr. and grandfather to young Randy and one of the toughest cats in- and outside the ring.

• Stacy Keibler has inked a deal with ABC Television and should be appearing in one of the network’s sitcoms by the fall season.

• Chris Jericho’s wife gave birth to twin girls earlier this week. Jericho is also staring in a play in the Toronto area and was recently featured in a movie on the Sci-Fi Channel.