We are live from the Mohegan Sun Casino in Uncasville, Connecticut and your announcers are Jim ‘BBQ Buffalo’ Ross, Jonathan ‘Annoys like no other’ Coachman, and Jerry ‘Dates them young’ Lawler.
Chris Jericho comes to the ring to start things off. Chris has something to say, but he does not have the Highlight Reel in front of him. He says that he is a genius and he has worked with Eric Bischoff to end the embarrassment that is John Cena’s WWE championship reign. The plan is going ‘swimmingly’. Look at last week. He exposed John Cena as a fraud in the ring and out of the ring. Chris talks about John’s ‘performance’ at the Battle of the Bands. Jericho says that was not rap, it was crap. Then we saw ‘Young MCena’ face Carlito and Carlito got a title match when he won thanks to the unbiased officiating from the fairest and best referee of all time. That would be Chris Jericho. Chris says that he wants to share the love with everyone so he asks the ‘monkeys in the truck’ to roll the footage. We see what Chris did to Cena last week. Jericho says it was a night to remember in referee history. Chris talks about John’s conundrum since he might lose his match at SummerSlam. Regardless of what happens tonight, he will walk out of SummerSlam with the title around his waist. Jericho tells Cena that he is nothing but a brown-nosing thug and Jericho will tear him apart at SummerSlam. The pain he felt last week will be nothing compared to what he will feel at SummerSlam. From out of nowhere Cena comes to the ring and he attacks Jericho. Bischoff comes out and he has ‘security’ come out to separate them. Bischoff tells Cena ‘damn you any way’. If Cena wants to raise hell and buck his authority. Bischoff says that his championship reign will come to an end tonight. Bischoff tells Cena that there will be a second referee so Cena will not get disqualified or counted out. It will be someone who can call it right down the middle. That referee is Chris Jericho. We go to commercial.
We are back with the Slam of the Week: Big Show helping out Shelton Benjamin from Chris Masters and Gene Snitsky.
We are back and it is time for a tag team match. Out first is Chris Masters. His partner is Gene Snitsky. One of their opponents is Shelton Benjamin. His tag team partner is Big Show. Show sends Benjamin over the top rope and he attacks Masters. Show pulls Snitsky outside the ring. Benjamin with crossfaces to Masters followed by a flying shoulder tackle. Show tags in and Masters tags in Snitsky. Show with a hip toss that brings Snitsky into the ring. Show with a head butt followed by open hand slaps to Snitsky. Show with an elbow to Snitsky and then Show tells Masters to come in the ring. Show with a chop to Snitsky followed by a head butt. Show with another chop to Snitsky followed by a boot to Snitsky’s throat. Show with the Shhhh chop and Show mocks Snitsky. Show with an Irish whip and then he clotheslines Snitsky over the top rope to the floor. Masters attacks Show from behind, but Show press slams Masters onto Snitsky outside the ring as we go to commercial.
We are back and Benjamin punches Snitsky in the corner followed by an elbow to the top of the head. Shelton with an Irish whip and he knocks Masters off the apron. Benjamin tries for the Stinger Splash, but Snitsky gets his boot up. Masters tags in and kicks Benjamin. Masters with a back breaker and a side slam. Masters with a bear hug. Masters with a power slam and then he tags in Snitsky. Snitsky with a forearm to Benjamin’s back. Snitsky with a slam to Benjamin and then he hits an elbow drop followed by a Cobra Clutch. Snitsky with a spinebuster to Benjamin, but he only gets a two count. Masters tags in and they both send Benjamin into the turnbuckles. Masters slaps Benjamin before tagging Snitsky back in. They throw Benjamin into the corner again and then they give Benjamin a double clothesline. Show comes in and cleans house. Snitsky stomps on Benjamin before tagging in Masters. Benjamin with a rollup. Benjamin tries a back slide, but Masters does not go down and then he hits a short arm clothesline. Masters with a front face lock with forearms to Benjamin’s back. Masters with a punch to Benjamin. Benjamin lands on his feet on a suplex attempt and hits a neck breaker on Masters. Snitsky tags in and he stops Benjamin from making the tag. Benjamin with a mule kick and Show is tagged in. Show slams Snitsky and clotheslines Masters. Show with an Irish whip to Snitsky that sends him into Masters and then he hits a splash on both in the corner before he hits a double shoulder block. Show turns Benjamin around into a dragon whip on Masters. Show with a choke slam on Snitsky for the three count.
Time for the WWE Rewind: Eugene winning the Kurt Angle Invitational. We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time for the Eugene Invitational. He comes out with Christy Hemme. Christy has the mic and she introduces Eugene. Eugene wants to play with Christy’s pom poms. She tells him to worry about his match. His home town hero comes to the ring, but it is Kurt Angle. Angle grabs the mic and he tells Eugene that enough is enough. Eugene wants to know his name and where he is from. Angle gets frustrated and says who he is and that he is from Pittsburgh. Eugene says that this is not Pittsburgh, so he is not a hometown hero. Angle says that he pretended that Eugene was from Cleveland. Eugene says that last week was pretend while this week is real. Angle wants to know what hometown hero there is on an Indian reservation. Eugene gives his medal to Christy. Before the match begins, Tatanka comes to the ring. Tatanka with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Eugene with an arm bar. Tatanka with a reversal and a leg drop to the arm. Eugene with an Irish whip, but Tatanka with a kick and chop. Tatanka with a chop to Eugene and it is time for a war dance and chop to the head. Tatanka goes up top with a chop to the head, but he only gets a two count. Eugene with an Angle slam and then he ‘takes the straps down’ and woooos. Eugene with an Ankle Lock, but Angle comes in and attacks Eugene. Angle with a European uppercut. Tatanka and Eugene alternate chops to Angle and then they clothesline Angle over the top rope to the floor.
It is time to take a look at footage from Larry King Live and the clip of the super kick. We hear Hogan’s side of the story. We go to commercial.
We are back and Kurt Angle is trashing the hallway. Todd Grisham wants to know about Eugene’s gold medal. Angle says that the gold medal is his and not Eugene’s. Next week in Pittsburgh, he will win his medal back and he does not care if Eugene brings the entire tribe because he will break his ankle and make Eugene very special.
It is time to take a look back at the end of the stretcher match and the damage that Kane caused with Edge and Lita. Then we see Kane commandeer the ambulance.
Chris Jericho is not happy in the BischOffice. Carlito enters and he tells Jericho that what Cena did was not cool. Jericho says that Cena knows that he will expose him as a fraud. Jericho says that he will get even as the guest referee. Then Carlito will be the new champion. Bischoff enters and tells Jericho and Carlito that it is up to Jericho to make sure that Carlito leaves with the Intercontinental and WWE titles. Bischoff tells Jericho and Carlito to figure out the plan before they leave.
A limo pulls into the garage and Vince McMahon emerges. He does a ‘stunt’ into commercial.
We are back and there is No Chance that Vince McMahon is going to come to the ring. Vince says that tonight is a special edition of Raw. He remembers the first edition at the Manhattan Center in New York in front of 1,200 people. It is the 636th edition of Raw tonight. It is a record surpassing any weekly entertainment show in history. Vince suggests that the classy thing would be to thank the fans all over the world for achieving this milestone. Instead, he wants to thank the one individual whose vision led to tonight. He wants to thank Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Vince says that he does not let his ego get in the way of making good business decisions. That is why the WWE is here tonight. Why would he bring back so many superstars after being stabbed in the back? Good business. Why would he bring a ‘son of a bitch’ like Eric Bischoff on Raw? Good business. Why would he bring a dead brand like ECW and give it new life? Good business. It is a decision about a former WWE superstar who has been building fires all over the WWE. Vince says that he has to poor gasoline all over it. He brings out the man who he has recently signed with the WWE and he will wrestle Edge at SummerSlam. That man is Matt Hardy. Matt emerges from the limo and comes into the arena and enters the ring. Matt shakes Vince’s hand and takes the mic. Matt guesses that he should thank Vince for bringing him back to Raw. Matt says that Vince did not bring him back to Raw; it was the people who brought him back. Matt says that he wants to thank them all. Matt wants to catch everyone up to speed about his situation. He was in a 6 year relationship with Amy Dumas (Lita). While Lita was ‘married’ to Kane on television, she always came home to Matt. While he was recovering from an injury, he found out that Amy was having an affair with Adam Copeland, one of Matt’s closest friends. His world was turned upside down. Matt says that the fans let Edge, Lita, and the WWE know how they feel. He talks about seeing 20,000 people chanting ‘We Want Matt’ and ‘You Screwed Matt’. At that time, the Matt Hardy Movement began and he took matters into his own hand. Now, Matt Hardy is back. Matt blames Edge for preventing him from having a family and almost destroyed his dream of being a WWE superstar. Matt says that Edge is mad because his personal life is miserable. Matt tells Edge that his personal and professional life will be so miserable that he will wish he was dead. The only thing that would make him happier than ending his career is if he was killed in a car accident. It will be ‘kill or be killed’ at SummerSlam, and Matt Hardy will not die. We go to commercial.
We are back and Vince is walking in the back and Kerwin stops him. Vince calls him Chavo, but Kerwin corrects him. Kerwin asks if there are any houses for sale in Greenwich. Vince says that he has forgotten what it is like to be middle class, like Kerwin so he wishes Kerwin luck.
It is time for our next match and out first is Val Venis. His opponent is Rob Conway. We see some comments from earlier tonight when Rob says that he is the fastest rising superstar in the WWE. He is going to do things his way, the ‘Con’ way. Conway with an arm bar. Val with a reversal, but Conway with a knee and side head lock. Conway with a shoulder tackle and he loses his sunglasses. Conway is not in a good mood. Val with an arm bar and hammer lock. Conway with an elbow in the corner followed by another elbow off an Irish whip. Conway with the delayed Scott Steiner elbow. Conway chops Venis in the corner. Val with an Irish whip and back body drop followed by a chop and elbow. Conway goes out of the ring and then he pulls Venis outside the ring. Venis punches Conway and chops him outside the ring. Conway with a shoulder tackle that knocks Val off the apron and into the ringside barrier. Conway grabs Venis and runs his back into the ringside barrier. He does the same thing to Venis’s back. Conway with an elbow and boot to Venis. Conway with a hard Irish whip. Conway with a rear chin lock. Venis with a Blue Thunder Driver. Venis punches Conway followed by an elbow. Venis with a drop toe hold and spinning toe hold. Venis with a modified figure four, but Conway makes it to the ropes. Conway with a knee to Venis, but Venis with a spinebuster. Venis goes up top, but Conway knocks Venis off the top turnbuckle. Conway with the ‘Ego Trip’ to Venis for the three count. We go to commercial.
We are back and it is time to look at some career highlights of Shawn Michaels. It is time for a parody of Hulk Hogan’s appearance on Larry King Live, with Shawn playing the part of Hogan. ‘Hulk’ goes ‘brother’ crazy talking his match with Shawn Michaels. He says that he feels 157 years old. We go to a caller from Battle Creek, and he says that he only wrestles in the big towns so he has never been to Battle Creek. We see a video package of Shawn’s career highlights. We return to ‘Hulk’ and his eyes are glazed over. He says that he needs to do some politicking with Vince. ‘Hulk’ talks about how Shawn did not make it to the next level. ‘Hulk’ talks about how Shawn Michaels gives everything in the ring. ‘Hulk’s’ bandana comes off and so does his wig when he asks ‘Mean Gene’. ‘Hogan’ poses and then he has a cramp before he super kicks ‘Larry’. ‘Hulk’ takes off the skull cap to reveal that it is Shawn Michaels. Shawn tells Hogan that he has his reality show, but at SummerSlam he wants to know what is going to happen when reality kicks you right in the face. We go dark after Shawn ‘super kicks’ the camera.
We see the contestants in Diva Search II: Saline Away emerge from the locker room for the Queen of the Mountain competition. We go to commercial.
We are back and the Diva Search contestants shake their talents. But first, we find out how we will have 20% fewer Divas. Summer is cut from the competition. It is time for the Elite Eight to bounce to the ring. It is time for the Queen of the Mountain competition. We have a special guest judge for this contest. It is Rob Schneider, but first, a clip from his new movie. Remember to check out Buck Woodward’s excellent detailed recap of the Diva Search segment. Rob has some advice for the contestants in the contest. The winner of the contest is Elisabeth. Coach asks Elisabeth to leave with him, but she turns Coach down for Rob Schneider.
It is time to take a look back at the events leading up to tonight’s title match between John Cena and Carlito. We go to commercial.
We are back and Chris Jericho is in the ring as the guest ref and Eric Bischoff is at ringside. Out first is the challenger, Carlito (with apple). It is time for the champion, John Cena to come to the ring. Cena goes after Jericho, but Carlito attacks him. Carlito chokes Cena with Cena’s shirt. Cena with an Irish whip and Jericho pulls Carlito out of the way. Carlito with a clothesline followed by a number of quick counts. Carlito punches Cena in the corner. Cena punches Carlito, but the referee stops Cena and then he helps Carlito send Cena into the ring post. We go to commercial.
We are back and Carlito has Cena in a key lock. Cena with a knee to Carlito followed by a punch and back elbow. Carlito kicks Cena and then hits a neck breaker. Jericho with an elbow to Cena followed by a Carlito cover. Carlito with a back elbow. Carlito with an elbow and punches in the corner. Carlito tries for a suplex, but Cena blocks it. Cena gets Carlito up for a suplex, but Jericho pulls Carlito down and Carlito with a DDT. Carlito with a forearm to Cena’s back followed by a knee to Cena’s head. Cena with the flying shoulder block and Cena goes after Jericho. Carlito gets Cena off Jericho. Carlito with a reverse chin lock. Cena with a back body drop to Carlito and both men are down. Carlito with a flatliner. Carlito throws Cena out of the ring and Carlito goes out after Cena. Jericho exposes the top of the ringside barrier and Carlito sends Cena’s head into the barrier. Jericho joins in the fun. Cena and Carlito exchange punches until Cena gets the advantage. Cena with a clothesline followed by a back body drop, Blue Thunder Driver and it is time for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Jericho refuses to make the count. Cena looks at Jericho and goes after him. Carlito hits Cena from behind and punches him. Cena punches Carlito. Jericho charges at Cena and gets an elbow for his troubles. Jericho with a kick to Cena when he gets Carlito up for the F-U. Cena sends Jericho into Bischoff and Cena hits the F-U for the three count when a new ref comes in. After the match, Jericho attacks Cena and hits a baseball slide that knocks Cena out of the ring. Jericho with a hot shot onto the ringside barrier. Jericho with a suplex to Cena on the floor. Jericho grabs a camera and hits Cena in the head with it. Cena is bleeding from the shot. Jericho punches Cena and then rolls him back into the ring. Jericho with a catapult that sends Cena’s throat into the bottom rope. Jericho puts Cena in the Walls while Bischoff slaps Cena.
Full Credit: PWInsider.com
