It’s Like…Enough
by Jonathan Brown
It’s like the first breath of air after emerging from a near death experience in a murky lake. That is the most effective explanation that can be offered after changing the channel from Raw this past Monday night. The expected removal of Hunter Hearst Helmsley from the main focus of the show never happened; so what had to be done was done, the channel was changed. Ratings? Who gives a damn about ratings or a HHH centered Raw for that matter? The WWE does not get it. So in addition to boycotting the monthly PPVs it may indeed be time to add Raw to the list of WWE products that have NO support from the Brown household.
It’s like being released from prison only to be rearrested while exiting the front gate. The short lived boycott ended at 10:14 p.m. but low and behold once was not enough to put Hunter on the screen. What the conversation between he and Batista was about is unclear, what is clear is that the second chance given to WWE to put someone else on the tube was short lived as the channel was changed to a rain soaked Mets game and stayed there never making its way back to Spike TV and it never will again. (I hope Captain Charisma is traded to Smackdown!)
It’s like escaping the scorching heat of the most arid dessert, finding a glass of ice cold lemonade, only to find out it is actually scorpion piss in a Dixie cup. The premature praising of HHH as one of the great champions of all time was just that, premature. And just like a teenager (male) getting involved for the first time not only was it too short but just as sticky. No championship belt means no air time. You have an Intercontinental champion that gets one word per month and…
It’s like sticking your nose into a milk carton again and again, day after day. If it was rotten yesterday it is just as rotten today. No more anti-HHH talk or bashing the WWE decision makers. W.W.MLKJr.D? Boycott, boycott and boycott some more. The pre order of tickets for Raw tix that go on sale June 4th? CANCELED. My annual purchase of the Wrestlemania DVD for my birthday? CANCELED. The purchase of all newly released WWE paperbacks? CANCELED.
It’s like being the geek in the band with the brand new retainer and wardrobe that features pansts 6 inches too short. Envy is the word to describe columnists of real sports like baseball, basketball and football. Each day they are given real topics to write about. The demise of a dynasty, the unexpected elevation of a new superstar, and the hunt for the championship are just some topics that can be covered. But this one horse town, presided over by Vinnie Mac is not doing it for me. A good column could focus on the reemergence of Booker T but why write it when we know tht his push will be over before it begins. Tag teams? What tag teams? John Cena? Let him fight someone else besides John Cena. We have a US champion that has not won a televised match in over 2 months and a #1 contender that carries a “title.”
It’s like finding out that Santa Claus does not exist, when you are 18. The only news us wrestling fans have access to are multi-posted half truths that border on National Enquirer quality reporting. The reputable wrestling magazines are so outdated by the time they hit the stands that they are only good for lining the litter pans of your favorite pets. Peeved? NO.
It’s like finally getting Halle Berry to go out with you but you find that it is one of the wrong 5 days, if you know what I mean. Why in the hell has the WWE been able to interrupt matches for the last year without a single person complaining? Imagine any other sport going to commercial in the middle of the action and when you return the losing team is now winning. Every time the WWE cuts to commercial, the wrestler that had the advantage is always in a dangerous predicament. We are “treated” to a split screen instant replay to show us what happened. Hey, genius, why not just show us the action uncut? DAMN IT!
Being a wrestling fan is far from easy. We all feel we can do a better job at whatever it is the hacks at WWE get paid to do. Maybe we could. But until the phone call to report to Titan Towers comes in, bitching about it will have to suffice. But even in this case, a wise man once said, “It’s like…Enough!”
Eviluther99@yahoo.com
