Hello and welcome once again to The Trademark Rants. In case you didn’t already know, my name is Mike, and apparently, I’m too subjective in my columns. So, in the interest of fairness (insert groans here). I’ve decided to ATTEMPT to write a purely objective column. Basically, what this means is that, instead of sharing my opinions about what is going on (which, to the uninformed, is subjectivity), I can only just report the facts, in a shallow and boring attempt to regain some journalistic integrity that I shouldn’t even have to worry about anyway. It may surprise you to know that I’m a critic (and a good one, at that) and not a reporter, so if this column sucks, you’ll know why. Blame the one reader who keeps telling me week in and week out how I should be more “objective” in my columns (despite the fact that objectivity is, in fact, the exact opposite of what I was hired to do on this website). So, now… OBJECTIVITY!
George W. Bush is the President of the United States of America.
I watch at least one hour of news programming and one hour of wrestling programming per day, on average.
Vince McMahon is the Chairman of World Wrestling Entertainment.
I will actually be attending the WWE No Way Out PPV live this Sunday in Pittsburgh. I have not yet decided what signs I will make, although the ones high on my list are “John 3:16”, “Support Your Local Indys”, and “Wait… This is a SmackDown show? I want my money back, you bastards!” Oh, and for the record, I’m only going because my friend Terry is paying for it out of some credit he has from a prior TicketMaster purchase. We actually had a choice between going to a SmackDown taping in Cleveland, or No Way Out in Pittsburgh. The tickets were the same price for both shows, so we chose Pay Per View. I hope to be able to get a column out of the experience.
Lollipop’s official website is http://www.lollipop-wrestling.com.
I actually got a letter from Laura Clayborne (who I mentioned in this column a few weeks back) a couple days ago, and she basically explained everything I wanted her to explain. I honestly don’t expect to hear from her again, though, although I would like to. I actually still care about this woman, despite everything that’s happened between us. I wish her the best, regardless.
I was able to watch TNA Impact on Fox Sports Net last Friday, and I thoroughly enjoyed the show, as I almost always do. In case you are wondering, TNA Impact can be seen on Fox Sports Net on Fridays at 4 p.m. and again on Saturdays at midnight in most markets. Check your Local Listings for exact times, though, as different FSN affiliates have different schedules.
Comedy Central begins airing new episodes of South Park on March 9th, two days after I turn 24.
I still have no exact plans to celebrate my birthday. I’m hoping to put something together with friends over the next couple of weeks.
There, in fact, was an Iron Man Match between Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle on SmackDown. I received several letters on the subject, and I still don’t really care about the match. But it did, in fact, happen.
I have never been paid for writing this column nor have I been paid for my contributions to various wrestling promotions. I mention this because I feel people need to understand that one does not pursue this goal for money, but because they feel a need to do it. If one goes into wrestling for money, they will ultimately lose out, either because they will work too hard for little to no pay whatsoever, or turn into a spoiled brat like Brock Lesnar. Oh, wait, that’s an opinion. Dang it! I’ve got to stay OBJECTIVE!!! I don’t want that one reader to get all whiny again…
Did I already mention that George W. Bush is currently the President of the United States? I thought so…
Bob Magee has re-posted a portion of his tips for Promoting Indys column that I mentioned in a column about 3PW a few weeks ago. You can check out that column on PWBTS.com, TheWrestlingVoice.com, and Gerwek.net.
3PW has apparently NOT gone out of business after all. They will be running their Third Anniversary Show at Viking Hall (what they have called “The New Alhambra”) on Saturday, February 19, 2005. Headlining the show will be 3PW Champion “Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels facing off against Slyck Wagner Brown. More Information on the show is available at 3PWrestling.com.
Anyone who feels they could do a better job as a columnist should take their cases to the webmasters of the various websites I appear on, as they ultimately have a say on who appears on their website and who does not.
AJ Styles retained the X Division Title over Christopher Daniels at last night’s Against All Odds Pay Per View. AJ won 2 to 1 over Daniels in a 30 Minute Iron Man Match.
Jeff Jarrett retained the NWA World’s Heavyweight Championship last night as well, defeating Kevin Nash with the help of Billy Gunn.
Sean Waltman also returned to TNA last night, interfering in the NWA Title match on Nash’s behalf.
Scott Hall has been drinking again.
The Main Event for this Sunday’s No Way Out PPV is a Barbed-Wire Cgae Match between The Big Show and John Bradshaw Layfield for JBL’s WWE Title. As far as I know, though, the Pennsylvania State Athletic Commission does not allow Barbed-Wire Matches to be sanctioned in Pennsylvania anymore. Why the WWE can overpass that stipulation while the Local Indys and CZW cannot is something I fail to understand. Bob Magee has written some columns addressing this double-standard over the past several weeks.
Former WWE Wrestler Brian Kendrick, who works now as “Spanky”, is apparently happier working on the Indy Circuit and in Japan than he was in WWE.
John 3:16-17 says “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.” These verses were taken from the New King James Version of the Bible.
Bill O’Reilly is the host of the O’Reilly Factor, which appears on the Fox News Channel. Fox News is owned by Rupert Murdoch, who also owns all of the Fox Networks, including Fox Sports Net, which broadcasts TNA Impact.
Former XPW King of the Deathmatch Champion Altar Boy Luke has no ill will towards XPW Owner Rob Black.
Speaking of Rob Black, both he and Lizzy Borden had charges against them dismissed recently. Appeals are pending.
The Folks at Northern Xtreme Wrestling are still attempting to sell the old RCW Wrestling Ring. The current asking price is $4500. The ring is used but in good condition, and if anyone is interested in buying this ring, e-mail me at TheMaverickMJ@yahoo.com, and I will give you the proper contact information.
I am really tired of this concept. I am also hoping you are, too. Like I said, blame the one reader who keeps complaining about my subjectivity. This was his idea…
Okay, I’m done for the week. If you have any comments, questions, or anything else you’d like to share, feel free to write me at TheMaverickMJ@yahoo.com. Thanks for reading, and feel free to come back again for another installment of The Trademark Rants! It’ll be a lot better than this one… trust me.
