INSIDE THE RING NEWSLETTER
Edition 30
by Trevor Hunnicutt and Eddie T
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS SESSION ADDED TO INSIDE THE RING
Hello to all the readers of the Inside the Ring Newsletter. We thank you very much for your support, and we’d like to welcome the many new subscribers that have added to our list over the past two weeks. We hope that you will enjoy our newsletter even more in 2005, and we’ll try our best to keep up-to-date with the latest in professional wrestling.
With this idea in mind, we have added a new section to the TBL Forums, called Inside the Ring Newsletter Q & A. In there, you can participate in our new Questions & Answers session! We get interesting letters from interesting people, and would like to share them with our audience. Some of these letters also have questions about current storylines or news. If you have any wrestling or martial arts-related questions, please feel free to ask away at the TBL Forums. You can also ask us by e-mail. Our addresses are at the bottom. We will respond to you as soon as we can, and also post your question (with our answer provided) in the Forums, and sometimes in the actual Newsletter, as well! Help us get this section of the Newsletter rolling! Ask away!
WWE NEW YEAR’S REVOLUTION
You can read a full report of the PPV right HERE.
Trevor 2.5
Tonight’s show was an abortion on many levels. It was actually really interesting to watch, as each segment of the show got progressively worse and managed to be uniquely painful. The first two matches ended tragically, and were followed by a good representation of WWE’s failure in planning. I was about to praise their execution of things too. Maven/Benjamin followed and Maven left the ring to cut a promo on the crowd for 6 minutes as the show went to hell, which was the combination of WWE not having confidence in Maven to work a strong PPV quality match (house show reviews of the match were bad) and them needing to stall for time. The fact that they had no backup ready or weren’t comfortable with this match is an inexcusable and vast misjudgment. The next match was Hassan and Lawler, in front of what was still a hot crowd. Well, this killed it. You could hear people eating there was so little heat, a problem which was compounded by not having any announcers to play up the wrestling. This was an obvious problem with booking this match in the first place. Bad match with less than no heat. Kane vs. Gene Snitsky followed. Obvious what went down here. Twelve minutes felt like twelve hours, poorly worked match. Elimination Chamber followed: nothing unexpected, but basic, clear-headed booking. The company has been reluctant to put Batista in the WrestleMania spot, but this show made obvious to me that’s the only option–no one cares about Orton being the sad truth. The interstitial segments were poor. Two points for the main event, 1/2 point for the show coming on the air without technical difficulties. For the sake of comparisons, Turning Point WITHOUT the main event was vastly better, and this show without the main event was worse than Women of Wrestling from The Great Western Forum.
This show was a tremendous example of what can go wrong with PPV and why, and hailed back to some of the worst WCW shows that I’ve had the opportunity to see. It should be an effective case study. But the sad part is this didn’t have to happen, two PPVs specifically come to mind from last year that suffered from a significant structural collapse (Great American Bash and Armageddon) which gave fair warning that this was a distinct possibility. I used to think that comparing WWE to WCW was largely a rhetorical warning, but WWE has repeated all of WCW’s mistakes in order in sadistic fashion.
Eddie: 3
That was awful. It really was. I have never given such a low grade before, and just writing that hurts right now. You have to understand that I’m looking at this company from a very special perspective – one of someone who has seen WWE at its best. Sure, I have gotten used to subpar performances, but this one really took the cake. There they were in front of a sold out crowd (something that would happen on weekly basis back in 2000) in Puerto Rico, and nothing worked. The Elimination Chamber saved this show. It would have been no doubt the worst PPV in a long time, if it hadn’t been for that match. However, the bout being so easy to predict as to who will win, and Triple H getting another cheap title reign (after all, the whole idea of this “vacated title” storyline was for H to add another title reign to his resume, and become a 10-time champion) really makes you think twice about it. There is little hope, and the name is Batista. It just became completely obvious tonight, that nobody cares about Randy Orton anymore. It’s a sad, sad, SAD story.
Heat
They didn’t even have a match on Heat. I guess, since nobody watches that program anyway, that doesn’t really matter.
Eugene/Regal vs. Tomko/Christian
I knew this is as good as wrestling as we’re going to get from the mid-card, since the better workers (Regal, Dinsmore, and Christian) and Green Goat were inserted into this match. It was nothing special, nor was it that good, but it certainly wasn’t bad. Eugene’s injury seemed legit, but them having Ross say what it is so quick makes me think it’s a gimmick. I hope he’s okay. Good opener.
Trish vs. Lita
I actually expected Trish to win this, but went with Lita as my guess, since I didn’t expect them to kill her that quick. Well, she proved she deserved. This was a woman who used to be able to wrestle, and perform on a very high level. What the f*ck happened? It scares me how bad she actually is, and I’m even starting to begin that she was never really good, it was the fact that everyone else in the women’s division at the time was horrible. Lita has also become dangerous. She’s almost killed herself twice for a period of one month now, and I don’t know about Trish and the other ladies, but I wouldn’t want to work a match with her, seeing how sloppy she has become. Scary. I certainly hope they look towards Victoria or Molly as an opponent for Trish soon. Stratus continues to strive for the best, but seems to be becoming a fighter for a lost cause. One thing’s for sure, she’ll never give up.
Shelton Benjamin vs. Maven
Horrifying. As the thousands of people stood there, excited to see WWE airing a PPV from their country for the first time ever, Maven proved that he’s a huge disappointment and should not be where he is. He was forced to talk for six minutes, because due to house show matches in the past weeks, WWE couldn’t trust him enough to be in a PPV match. And that’s scary. For a guy who’s been with the company for so long, and for a guy who showed so much progress on Tough Enough, he has gone downhill. They should send him to OVW, or completely forget about him. He’s not in Benjamin’s league.
Hassan vs. Lawler
The one time that WWE actually NEEDED and SHOULD HAVE went to Coach for commentary, they didn’t. What can I say? I really don’t have anything else to say about this match.
Kane vs. Snitsky
Well Mean Gene wasn’t as mean this time around, and Kane got his. I don’t know how that man does it. To go through all the crap that he goes through, and still have a will and desire for what he does, is beyond me. I give Kane a lot of credit. This was an ok brawl, but they made the mistake of giving it a lot of time. Snitsky was exposed badly, and proved that he shouldn’t be in WWE to begin with. Another horrible example of OVW people being sent in too soon.
Elimination Chamber
It saved the show. It was a one-match PPV, right? Well, it delivered. It wasn’t a spectacular for so many reasons – the mood was just down and there was not the same excitement around it, as there was in the previous two, although they did a good job of promoting it. Another biggie was the fact that we all knew who’s going to win. It’s become obvious to the whole entire world, that Triple H is, without a shadow of a doubt, the smartest man ever. At one point during this show, I wanted to make myself stop watching wrestling until the man retires. Not much else to say. The only positive of the night did come up in here. They seem to be doing a tremendous job with Batista, and I applaud them for that. It is truly the ONLY thing they have going right now, and the only reason people tune in to RAW (although people like me and Trevor would tune in anyway, but we wouldn’t care for the show). Being the smart man that he is, I’m sure that Trips will do the job for Big Dave. Why wouldn’t he? 1) It puts him over with people as a good guy, since he’s willing to do the job, and 2) He gets to win it back, and add another reign, and get closer to that 17th title reign he’s dreaming of (to beat Flair by one). And that my friend, is a shoot.
WWE RAW (1/3)
Trevor’s thoughts are in blue.
Eddie’s thoughts are in red.
Report by PWInsider.com
We are less than a week from the New Year’s Revolution pay per view, and we have three matches announced. What will happen tonight to get people on the fence to buy this pay per view? What will happen with the Great Debate of 2005?
Do you remember last week when it was ‘Beat the Clock’ night for the Elimination Chamber participants to determine who will be encased in bulletproof and unbreakable glass the longest? How about when Hunter and Batista had some words about Batista’s match with Rhyno? Where were you when Shawn Michaels was announced as the ‘guest referee’?
We are live from Uniondale, Long Island, New York, and your announcers are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. We see the World title belt in the hands of Eric Bischoff. He reminds us that the new champion will be determined in the Elimination Chamber. Before the pay per view, there are things to do. Last week, it was ‘Beat the Clock’. Tonight, they will get a chance to beat each other. There will be three matches involving the participants. Batista will face Chris Benoit; Edge will face Chris Jericho; and Triple H will face Randy Orton.
Trevor: Last week’s gimmick was a success, but this week’s “gimmick” has only one purpose: to keep the New Year’s Revolution match in fan’s minds and give away big matches on RAW. Obviously the writers were lazy this week, but what do you expect with a PPV on Sunday?
Eddie: With one week before the big PPV event to open up 2005, they did an OK job of reminding us the Elimination Chamber is on this Sunday! That’s really the only purpose the show should have had, seeing as the PPV has been booked as a one-match show anyway.
It is time for our first match and out first is Batista. Out next is his opponent, Chris Benoit. Batista throws Benoit down on the collar and elbow tie up. Batista with knees in the corner followed by a forearm to his back. Benoit with the dragon screw leg whip followed by a Sharpshooter attempt. Benoit chops Batista, but he does not feel anything. Batista with a backbreaker on Benoit and then he exposes the top turnbuckle. Benoit with the Hat Trick German Suplex combo. Benoit goes up top, but Batista rolls outside the ring. Batista slams Benoit’s head on the ringside barrier. Benoit goes up top, but Batista crotches him on the top rope and he has him up for a Fisherman’s Suplex and connects but only gets a two count. Batista with a Single Leg Crab, and Batista slams Benoit’s hand on the mat to make him tap. Benoit with more chops to Benoit, but Batista with a spinebuster. Benoit with forearms followed by an enziguiri on Batista and both men are down. Benoit gets up first and he hits a drop kick while Batista gets up. Batista has Benoit up for a powerslam, but Benoit counters with a German Suplex. Benoit with the flying headbutt from the top rope, but Benoit only gets a two count. Benoit with a drop kick to the back of Batista’s leg. Benoit kicks Batista in the knee. Batista has Benoit up for a spinebuster, but Batista’s knee gives out. Benoit locks in the Crossface, but Batista powers out and slams Benoit’s head on the exposed turnbuckle a number of times. Batista with the Sit Out Batista Bomb for the three count. We go to commercial.
We are back and Flair is talking about the power of Batista against Benoit and how it is great for Evolution. From out of nowhere, Batista enters the Evo-Locker Room. Flair tells Hunter that all he has to do is take care of the four and then Batista will finish them off for Hunter to win the title back. Hunter says that he can count on Batista. Batista wants the $100 from last week. Hunter seems shocked at Batista’s request. Batista reminds Hunter about the bet and he wants his money. Hunter tells Flair to give Batista $100. Batista tells Flair that he doesn’t want his money, he wants Hunter’s money because he made the bet. Hunter gives Batista $100, and then Batista tells him to get a sense of humor because he was only kidding.
Trevor: Of all the angles and matches on the show, I was most satisfied with Benoit vs. Batista and the strong developments with Batista on the show. Benoit vs. Batista was an effective match at getting Batista’s strengths-within the context of winning a match-over. The backstage segments with HHH and Batista have been entertaining and effective.
Eddie: They continued to do a tremendous job with Batista’s push. The strength of all the work they’ve put into it has been mostly based on the backstage segments between big Dave and Triple H. They have been executed very well, and the direction has been very clear and exact. Lately, they have tried to also put Batista over wrestling-wise, and to admit, he has stepped it up inside the ring. However, they have been very smart about it – giving him a squash match last week, and a long bout with someone who can help him carry a good match this week, in Benoit. They might be doing a horrible job in all aspects of the wrestling industry, but one thing is for sure – they have done a very solid job with Batista and I give them a lot of credit for that.
We go to the interview area where Maria is getting ready to interview Gene Snitsky.
Do you remember when Gene Snitsky ‘injured’ Kane at Taboo Tuesday? We have the video to prove it.
Maria asks Gene about his match with Kane on Sunday. Gene says that he is surprised because of what he did at Taboo Tuesday. Gene asks Maria if she likes surprises because he does. Gene whispers something in Maria’s ear and then he smells her hair. She runs away in fear. Gene picks up the mic and he says that he hopes Kane is watching because he has a surprise for him that he will not like. Gene says that what happens ‘Is not my fault’.
Trevor: Snitsky is awful, still.
Eddie: Maria is awful. So is Snitsky.
We go to Edge in the Bischoffice and he wants to know why Eric is doing this to him. Eric says that he expected Edge and Jericho to have a competitive match. Edge says that he is talking about the announcement of Shawn Michaels as the guest referee. Edge reminds Eric what he did to Shawn at Taboo Tuesday. Eric says that he added six weeks to Shawn’s recovery, and that was six weeks that he did not appear on television or at house shows. Eric says that Edge owes him for that time. Eric says that Edge should take out his problems on Chris Jericho because his match is next. We go to commercial.
We are back with the WWE Rewind: Edge spearing Shawn Michaels at Taboo Tuesday.
It is time for our next match and I think you know who is coming out first, and that is Edge. We countdown to his opponent, Chris Jericho. Edge with a go behind, but Jericho with a standing switch and takedown. Jericho with a bow and arrow, but his shoulders were on the mat. Edge with a kick and a forearm to the back of his neck. Jericho chops Edge and he goes down. Jericho with a back elbow and a forearm to Edge. Edge responds with a forearm of his own. Jericho sends Edge over the top rope to the floor. Jericho tries for a baseball slide, but Edge moves out of the way. Edge and Jericho with a double clothesline and both men are down. We go to commercial.
We are back and Edge has Jericho in a key lock. Jericho with a chop, but Edge with an arm bar DDT. Jericho with a flying forearm and a shoulder block. Jericho with a bulldog and it is time for the Lionsault, but Edge moves. Jericho lands on his feet and then he hits a Huracanrana for a two count. Jericho with an enziguiri that sends Edge into the ropes. Jericho sets up for the Big Bossman Memorial Splash, but Edge with a boot to Jericho for a two count. Jericho with a Northern Lights Suplex and bridge for a two count. Jericho sets up Edge for the Walls of Jericho, but Edge powers out of it. Jericho with a running clothesline and a near fall. Jericho kicks Edge in the ribs and then goes up top. Edge punches Jericho when he is up top. Edge with a Superplex attempt, but he sends Edge to the mat face first. Jericho misses a cross body press from the top when Edge moves. Edge gets ready for the Spear, but Jericho with a leap frog. Jericho tries for a Victory Roll, but Edge holds on to the ropes for the three count.
Trevor: Good match, and obviously an improvement on last week’s Edge vs. Eugene, but I’m left wondering what’s gained by this match and the finish, such as last week’s exciting yet subtractive match between Triple H and Shelton Benjamin.
Eddie: I didn’t like this pairing. I’ll talk more about this in my comments on the main event. Jericho had another good match – something he’s been doing on a regular basis for a very long period of time now. Unfortunately he’s in the wrong place, and if at times he’s at the right place, he’s there at the wrong time.
We go to the interview area where Coach is with Randy Orton. Coach wants to know if Randy will beat Triple H. Randy says that tonight is his first chance to face Hunter since he lost the title. Randy says that he will win the title on Sunday. Randy says that Hunter took everything away from him in 2004. In 2005, he will take everything away from Hunter. It starts when he beats him tonight with the RKO. We go to commercial.
We are back and Jim Ross tells us that if you are in the United Kingdom, you can watch Raw live.
La Resistance is in the ring as Sylvan Grenier (with Rob Conway) has a match. His opponent is the Intercontinental Champion, Shelton Benjamin. Before the match, from out of nowhere, Maven comes out to watch. Grenier pushes Benjamin off the apron and Conway hits Benjamin while the ref is distracted. Grenier rolls Benjamin back in the ring and tries for a quick cover. Grenier with kicks in the corner followed by a suplex. Grenier with a belly-to-back suplex while Maven talks about what he did for New Year’s Eve. Grenier with a full nelson. Benjamin and Grenier exchange punches and Benjamin with a back body drop and a shoulder block. Benjamin with the Stinger Splash, but Conway gets on the apron to distract Benjamin. Grenier with a standing drop kick and nips up. Grenier and Conway have some words. Benjamin nips up and then he does a leap frog over Grenier that knocks Conway off the apron. Benjamin with a dragon whip followed by the T-Bone Slam for the three count.
Trevor: Good match.
Eddie: Maven is lacking charisma, and personality. He tried really hard to be someone he’s not, and he’s obviously not doing well with this character. It seemed as if he’s trying to be Christian, but he isn’t… on all levels.
We go to a video package about the Elimination Chamber and its history.
We go the back where Mohammad and Khosrow get ready for their debate and walk into commercial.
We are back with the Slam of the Week: Khosrow getting in Lawler and Ross’s face last week and the result.
It is time for the ‘Most important debate of the year’. Your moderator is Todd ‘Are Debates like Lucha Libre’ Grisham. Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are already in the ring. Muhammad Hassan and Khosrow Daivari come to the ring. Todd has a question for Muhammad about whether he thinks Arab-Americans have been unfairly persecuted since 9/11. Before he can answer, a ‘USA’ chant begins. Hassan calls America a racist nation, and says that it was based on slavery. He says that Arabs were discriminated against before 9/11. He says that American used a tragedy to allow their real feelings to come out. He says that if he went to Times Square on New Year’s Eve, he would have been searched. He says that intolerance and arrogance is why America is hated throughout the world. Jerry Lawler with the response. He says that there are racists in this country, but there are racists and idiots in every country. Jerry says that he has no problem with them complaining about this country. However, he came out and called the troops ‘gutless cowards’. Jerry says that the fans don’t hate them because they are Arab-American, but because they are loud obnoxious jackasses. Daivari starts to yell incoherently in Farsi. Hassan says most Arab-Americans are not like him, and they make him sick. He says that they hide their heritage. Hassan says that he will not embrace a racist nation. Hassan says that he is as American as Jim Ross. He calls JR a coward when he is face to face with Hassan. JR has something to say to Hassan. He says that America is not a perfect place, but not everybody is a racist. Jim Ross tells them to ‘Love it, or by god, you leave it’. Hassan throws down the lectern and stands in Jim Ross’s face. He punches Ross in the gut, and then they go after Lawler. Hassan chokes Jim Ross with a belt. We see Jerry Lawler bleeding and he takes off his belt and goes back into the ring. Hassan and Daivari go to the back. We go to commercial.
We are back and Coach is at the announce position to take over for Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. We have a moments ago moment of what happened during the debate.
Trevor: There was more heat for this angle than I’ve seen in awhile, and some time ago that would be both indicative and symptomatic of a good angle, but that wasn’t the case here. Nothing of substance in the argument, except a bad scripted line where Lawler said that you can love or leave the USA, which was a good mark out line for everyone disconnected with reality, which was a good portion of the crowd. Well executed angle if hokey.
Eddie: It was well-done, just like most of the Hassan and Daivari segments have been. It’s a shame that their storyline is so horrible, because they are both very charismatic, and seemed to be good outside the ring.
It is time for Trish Stratus to come to the ring for her match. Her opponent is Victoria in a rematch from Heat. Trish with forearms to Victoria followed by a kick to Victoria. Trish with kicks in the corner followed by a chop and snap mare. Trish pulls Victoria up by the hair. Trish throws Victoria into the corner and then pulls her up by the hair and chokes her from the top turnbuckle. Trish with a Northern Lariat on Victoria and then chokes her. Trish with a catapult that sends Victoria’s throat into the bottom rope. Trish tries for Stratusfaction, but Victoria counters with a belly-to-back suplex. Trish sets up for the Chick kick, but Victoria ducks and tries for a rollup. Victoria with clotheslines to Trish and a back elbow. Victoria with a headbutt and a slam followed by the standing moonsault, but Trish gets her knees up. Trish with a kick to the back of Victoria’s head for the three count. After the match, Trish gets a mic and tells Lita that this is what will happen on Sunday night when she regains the title. From out of nowhere, Lita comes to the ring and gets in Trish’s face. She drops the belt in the ring and then she slaps Trish. They exchange punches until Lita gains control. She kicks Trish in the corner and chokes her. Lita with a monkey flip and then she punches Trish. Pyro goes off and they stop. Lita chokes Trish out in the ring. From out of nowhere, Gene Snitsky comes into the ring to break things up. Lita turns around and walks into a Chick Kick. Gene goes outside and gets a chair. He sets Lita up like he did to her ‘husband’. From out of nowhere, Kane’s pyro goes off and he comes to the ring. Gene meets Snitsky outside the ring and they exchange punches. Kane with an uppercut and Snitsky goes into the crowd. Kane goes into the ring to check on his ‘wife’. We go to commercial.
Trevor: It would’ve been better to save Kane for the PPV, but there are obviously deeper problems with this storyline.
Eddie: What a horrible waste! Kane’s return should have been saved for PPV, and it should have been promoted more. Of all nights to screw up Kane’s pyro, they had to do it on the night he returned. First, his entrance pyro went off too early, then there he was standing, looking at Lita, and his ring pyro goes off too. Horrible mistakes.
We are back and it is time to look at the Elimination Chamber match at SummerSlam 2003.
We find out that Jerry Lawler demanded a match for the pay per view, and he will face Muhammad Hassan. They have also added Shelton Benjamin versus Maven for the Intercontinental Title to add to the card. We have a tag title match where William Regal and Eugene will defend the title against Tyson Tomko and Christian. Those are added to the Kane versus Gene Snitsky; Lita versus Trish Stratus
We go to a photo shoot with Christy Hemme. From out of nowhere, Eugene joins in and he compares her hair to Lindsay Lohan. It turns out that he is listening to her CD and he sings one of her songs. William Regal tells Eugene that he has a match with Christian. Christy says that she will give Eugene some motivation for his match. Regal picks up Eugene’s CD player and he starts dancing and singing. Eugene and Christy return to the room and they get a good laugh. We go to commercial.
Trevor: Funny segment, great for a midcard comedy gimmick, but there are obvious reasons why Kurt Angle doing this every week of the year in years past has hurt him.
Eddie: I enjoyed the segment a lot. It was very entertaining, and it fit the Eugene gimmick well. Dinsmore is not meant to be a Heavyweight Champion, nor is Regal headed in that direction in that phase of his career. They can allow more comedy spots with these two, because they’re great at it. That’s what they should have done with Dinsmore all along, instead of pushing him where he didn’t belong.
We are back and it is time for our next match. Out first is Eugene (with William Regal). Out next is his opponent, Christian (with Tyson Tomko). Do you remember last night when Christian tried to interfere in the match between Tyson Tomko and William Regal? Since it was an episode of Heat, probably not. Eugene with a side head lock followed by a shoulder block. Christian kicks Eugene. Eugene does the Ultimate Warrior Gorilla Press and then he does the Ultimate Warrior Splash. Eugene slams Christian’s head into the turnbuckles and then goes up top. Christian slams Eugene from the top turnbuckle. Christian throws Eugene out of the ring and Tomko runs his back into the apron. Christian pulls Eugene’s hair to keep the advantage. Eugene with a Rock Bottom. Eugene with an airplane spin, but Christian with an eye rake. Christian tries for an Unprettier, but Eugene has Christian in a Double Chicken Wing. Eugene releases the hold when Tomko charges into the ring. Eugene throws Tomko out of the ring. Eugene knocks Tomko off the apron. Tomko with a big boot to Regal outside the ring. Christian gets a rollup with the help of the ropes and Tomko to get the three count.
Trevor: Wasn’t crazy about this match.
Eddie: Solid bout. I wish there was more of a story behind the PPV bout these two teams had.
We go to the Evo-Locker Room and Flair says that they will be at ringside for him. Hunter says that he does not need Batista at ringside tonight because it is only one person, and that person is Randy Orton. Hunter will prove tonight that Orton is a tag along. Flair leaves. Batista tells Hunter that he will stay in the back unless Orton starts kicking Hunter’s ass. Batista says that he is kidding as we go to commercial.
We are back and Jim Ross has joined Coach. He says that he has been better, and he is here to do his job. Jim Ross says things will be different on Sunday.
It is time for our main event and it is Game Time as Triple H (with Ric Flair and GameFountain) come to the ring. Out next is his opponent, Randy Orton. Hunter with a shoulder block, but Orton with a drop kick followed by a punch. Orton tries a rollup on Hunter when he charges in the corner. Orton with a shoulder block followed by a clothesline. Hunter with a boot to Orton’s head. Both men exchange punches. Orton with a back body drop and he tries for the RKO, but Hunter escapes the hold and he goes outside the ring. Flair comes over to talk to Hunter as we go to commercial.
We are back and Orton is giving Hunter the punches of ten. Hunter does the Hunter flip to the floor on an Irish Whip. Orton slams Hunter’s head on the apron. Flair gets in Orton’s face, allowing Hunter to drop Orton’s throat on the top rope. Orton with a shoulder from the apron, but Hunter knocks Orton off the apron into the front row. Hunter relaxes along the ropes while the ref counts him out. Hunter distracts the ref, allowing Ric Flair to jump on Orton’s gut. Hunter with shoulder blocks in the corner. Hunter with a knee to Orton. Hunter sends Orton outside the ring, and Flair distracts the ref in the ring while Hunter deals with Orton outside the ring. Orton sends Hunter into the ring post while Orton rolls back into the ring. Orton with punches to Hunter followed by a European Uppercut. Orton with a power slam. Orton with two modified backbreakers. Orton goes up top and hits the cross body press. Orton prepares for the RKO, but Hunter counters by sending Orton off the ropes and puts Orton in the sleeper. Both men reverse each other until Orton locks in the sleeper. Hunter pulls the ref into Orton and he goes down. Flair gives Hunter the ring bell, but Orton with a kick. He knocks Flair off the apron and he picks up the bell and hits Hunter with it. From out of nowhere, Batista comes out and clotheslines Orton. From out of another nowhere, Benoit comes out and he attacks Batista. From out of yet another nowhere, Shawn Michaels comes out to check on the ref. From out of yet another nowhere, Edge comes out and prepares to spear Michaels, but from out of even yet another nowhere, Jericho knocks Edge down. Jericho with a tope onto everyone outside the ring. Michaels starts the count and Hunter realizes that Shawn is the ref. Hunter yells at Michaels and Orton comes up from behind and tries for an RKO, but Hunter throws him down. Hunter tries for a Pedigree, but Orton with a bridge for a two count. Orton hits the RKO for the three count. We go to credits.
Trevor: Good match, but I have to ask again, why.?
Eddie: Like I said above, I did not like the pairings of Edge vs. Jericho and Orton vs. Triple H. Just like last week, with Triple H vs. Benjamin, they gave away what is a PPV match. And why? Why now?! A week before a PPV?! Ugh! What a horrible decision. Not only that, but this match didn’t do anything for anyone. It just proved that slowly, but steadily, Orton’s light is fading. To me, he’s a goner as far as the crowd goes. A guy they put an year and a half info is about to go downhill. It’s unfortunate, but true.
Trevor: (7)
This was a weird show. The angle execution was pretty good, as was the wrestling, but the booking decisions and directions were problematic and irksome to a shameful degree. The Hassan situation for example: it was hokey and the arguments lacked logic but it made sense on a purely emotional level (that’s the level you’re supposed to react to wrestling) and overall was executed well. On the other hand, when the only time you introduce a character he feuds with a 50 year old announcer who looks every bit his age, its usually (especially in this case) indicative of a larger problem. The running theme of the night was another example, pitting Elimination Chamber opponents in singles matches. The matches were great and gave the show a big-show feel, but this was the wrong time to give out those matches with those finishes, and the only effective one was Batista vs. Chris Benoit. As an aside, they’ve been doing tremendously with Batista. In the end, from a fan’s perspective, this was an entertaining, individual show, but I left the show with tremendous concerns about almost every single storyline.
Eddie: (7)
This was a mostly fun show, that did have its ups and downs. They pushed the Elimination Chamber bout one more time, and tried to make us think about the match for the entire two hours of the broadcast. Whether us thinking about it was going to make us buy the PPV was a different question. They continued to do a great job of pushing Batista, and with every week, it’s becoming more and more obvious that the fans are reacting much stronger to him, as compared to Randy Orton. They have just gotten a liking for Batista, and WWE should be given credit, because it was them who stuffed him down our throats for quite some time. He also deserves for credit for finally getting into the rhytm of success. Big things are ahead of Big Dave, and I hope that the company doesn’t kill his push, because it’s the only thing they have going. The rest of the show was a loose cannon, and the big mistake of the night was the main event – a PPV quality match given away on free TV with no in-advance advertising, or any real purpose. Big letdown.
WWE SMACKDOWN (1/6)
The first Smackdown of 2005, emanating from the Mohegan Sun Casino in Uncasville, CT, began with the usual opening video.
Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio
Eddie came out first with his low-rider entrance to a great pop. Tazz and Michael Cole reminded us that last week Mysterio and RVD eeked out a win over Guerrero and Booker T. to successfully defend the WWE Tag Titles. Mysterio came out next, with a video camera in hand, to an equally strong pop. Eddie took Rey’s camera and got a nice shot of Joy sitting at ringside. Eddie started with a hammer lock into a side headlock. Eddie worked the arm some more until Rey reversed into an arm drag/head-scissors takeover. Rey catapulted out of a monkey flip attempt into a sunset flip for a two count. Rey hit a tilt-a-whirl head-scissors and a boot to the gut. Eddie countered with a facebuster. Eddie locked in an armbar and Rey struggled to get to the ropes. Eddie went back to the hammerlock as the crowd went into a “619” chant. Eddie continued to work the arm with a chicken wing on the mat, doing a head stand to add leverage. Rey went for a springboard moonsault but got caught. Eddie put Rey into the Tree of Woe and worked the ribs with some boots to the midsection. Eddie charged but Rey sat up and Eddie went shoulder first into the post as they went to commercial.
Back from commercial, Mysterio was suddenly in control. He hit a springboard plancha and leg drop during the break. Fans began chanting for Eddie as Mysterio worked an arm bar in the center of the ring. Eddie worked out of the armbar and hit a DDT for two. Mysterio came back with some rights and then the two traded sleeper holds. Rey landed some stiff kicks to the ribs and then hit a moonsault for two. Rey went back to the sleeper on the mat and grapevined Eddie’s right arm as well. Eddie got back to his feet with some elbows and went for a powerbomb, but Rey floated over and dropkicked Eddie into the middle rope and went for a 619 to no avail. Rey whipped Eddie into the corner and went for Bronco Buster but Eddie moved out of the way. Rey shot Eddie into the ropes and hit a monkey flip and then went for a rana but Eddie hung on to the ropes. Eddie floated over for a sunset flip off the top for a quick two, but Rey quickly nailed a low dropkick for another two count. Eddie sent Rey into the corner and went for a rana but Eddie tossed Rey over his head right into the referee. Eddie then decided to take advantage by going outside for the tag strap. Eddie put the belt on a prone Rey and then pretended to lay down. However, Rey turned the tables on Eddie and put the belt back on him as the ref came to. In a funny spot, Eddie hid the belt from the ref but got caught as he tried to toss it out of the ring. The ref threatened to disqualify Eddie. Eddie laid on the ropes in frustration so Mysterio decided to go for a 619. Eddie ducked and rolled Rey up in a small package. Rey managed to roll through the small package and got a three count for the win at the fifteen minute mark.
Trevor: A nice treat for a TV match.
Eddie: Tremendous match. A very hot start of 2005 for the SmackDown crew. These guys are two of the best wrestlers in the business today, and without a doubt two future legends, with a lot of history in their own families. I have to hand it to Eddie and Rey for an amazing bout. While this was great wrestling, it was also very entertaining. The ending was well-thought-out, and very fun to watch.
Backstage, Heidenreich thanked Paul Heyman for helping him out of the casket stipulation at the Royal Rumble. Heyman reassured Heidenreich that he would take care of the situation for him. They then promoted a “Battle Rap” between John Cena and Kenzo Suzuki for later on.
Back from commercial break, Carlito Caribbean Cool made his way toward the ring area with a clipboard in hand as he sat next to Tazz and Cole at the announce table. Carlito revealed that the clipboard was a petition to get rid of Theodore Long as Smackdown GM, then left the announce position.
Funaki vs. Akio (Cruiserweight Championship Match)
Funaki came out first followed shortly by Akio, who had a brand new look. Funaki started out working the arm and then hit a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. Meanwhile, Carlito walked into the ring with the petition during the match. He continued to work his way around the ring area getting fans to sign. In the ring, Akio hit an enziguiri for a two count. Akio missed a spin kick and Funaki hit a back body drop. Funaki hit a bulldog for two. Funaki went to the corner but Akio caught him with a spinning heel kick for two. Akio then went for a corkscrew moonsault but missed. Funaki quickly climbed the turnbuckle and hit a tornado DDT for the victory in just over three minutes. Meanwhile, Carlito tried to get Joy to sign his petition but she politely turned him down, which led to a delayed apple shower right in the face and cleavage region. Michael Cole put over that Carlito was a pig as they went to break.
Trevor: Carlito walking around the ring with the petition was a good way of telling viewers not to care about the match or the title. In general, feuds between talent and general managers can be good but if only effectively used to create matches on PPV. As you can tell, they are desperate to have Carlito on TV, but they can’t think of anything at all that isn’t physical, which is a demonstration of the writing team’s weaknesses.
Eddie: Their lack of care for the cruiserweights was proven here. I like that they’re trying to keep Carlito on TV, and hopefully his storyline with Long will work out better in the future.
Smackdown returned from break with Heyman pleading with Teddy Long about the casket match with the Undertaker at the Royal Rumble. Heyman told Long that a casket match was “cruel and unusual punishment” and Heidenreich began getting restless as Heyman described the torture of being locked inside a casket. Teddy Long replied that if Heidenreich could win his match against the Undertaker tonight, then the stipulation would be removed and Heidenreich would be able to name the stipulation for their match. However, the catch 22 was that it was a handicap match pitting Heidenreich and Heyman against the Undertaker. Heyman panicked and complained but Heidenreich reassured him that everything would be okay.
Amy Weber approached Kurt Angle while he was talking with his normal entourage. She told Angle that she saw some opportunities for him after the Royal Rumble. She invited him back to her locker room after his match to “talk about it some more privately.”
The goofy Royal Rumble = West Side Story video aired as we return from commercial break.
Kurt Angle vs. Brian Black
Time for the weekly edition of the Kurt Angle Invitational as Tazz and Cole plug the Triple Threat Match for the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble between Angle, Big Show and JBL. Angle snatched the mic and said that this week he had to not only win his match, but he had to make his opponent tap within three minutes or he will award his opponent his Olympic Gold Medal. His jobber err … opponent this week is Brian Black, who promptly went for the cheap pop. Angle quickly swatted Black with a right hand, slapped him around on the mat, hit a couple of stiff kicks to the gut and locked in the Ankle Lock for the quick victory … 26 seconds according to Tazz.
Trevor: I was going to make a side comment asking where this was leading to, but we might as well wait and see.
Eddie: The Kurt Angle Invitational is on the edge of being lame and boring. They needed to freshen things up if they want the person who finally beats Kurt to actually get something out of it!
Backstage, Daniel Puder ran into Torrie Wilson and Miss Jackie. Puder introduced himself as the Tough Enough Champion. Torrie reminded Puder that Jackie was a Tough Enough Champion as well. Puder then heeled Jackie about the boyfriend incident on TE 2 and then rubbed in her recent dumping at the hands of Charlie Haas. He said “what goes around comes around” and that all the women want is his money.
Trevor: This was lame, but I’m not just upset that the acting was bad, but it doesn’t make sense that Puder is heel or that he’s on TV at this stage.
Eddie: I talked about this last week. I have no further comments. (Yes, I’m still disgusted.)
A WWE 24/7 video package aired as they continue to promote this tremendous new feature.
John Cena vs. Kenzo Suzuki in a Battle Rap
Michael Cole was the MC for this monumentous event. Kenzo came out in an Uncle Sam costume with Hiroko to some decent heel heat. John Cena came out next to a thunderous pop. Cena handed his towel to a young fan at ringside and then grabbed a sign that read “The Chain Gang.” Cole said that the two combatants would wrestle for the US Title next week. Kenzo took the mic from Cole and told Cena he was about to get served. Kenzo did a rap that was supposed to be America-friendly. Many of his words were difficult to understand. He did the “you can’t see me” line in Cena’s face. The fans then erupted into a “Cena” chant to the dismay of Suzuki and Hiroko. Cena told Suzuki he was just a chump in a suit and that this (points to the fans) is the real USA. Cena then went into his usual Michael Cole/gay joke before he began making disparaging remarks toward Hiroko and her makeup. Suzuki handed the mic to Hiroko who began her rendition of “Crazy Love.” Cena referred to her as Yoko Ono and told her to stop. Cena told the fans he had something everyone wanted to see. He brought out the Divas (Lauren, Michelle and Rochelle). Cena pandered to the crowd some more as another “Cena” chant erupted. Meanwhile, Kenzo liked what he saw in Michelle McCool. Hiroko attacked Michelle and then Kenzo went after Cena. Cena came back with some right hands and cleaned house. Cena closed by saying, “if you want some, come get some” as Cole hyped their match for next week.
Trevor: This wasn’t nearly as embarrassing as the last time John Cena cut a promo on Kenzo Suzuki, but it did show how tired Cena’s gimmick is, and was a bad segment. We’re talking about something that’s at this stage a hindrance to Cena. If they are genuine in their wish to make 2005 the year they push John Cena, one of the things they need to fix is a gimmick that’s played out.
Eddie: I agree with Trevor here. While last week’s promo was a big step forward for Cena, this week seemed like a big step backward.
Back from break, they announced a Fatal Four Way Tag Team Title Match for next week’s Smackdown featuring RVD & Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero & Booker T. vs. The Bashams vs. Mark Jindrak & Luther Reigns.
Rob Van Dam vs. Doug Basham
RVD came out first accompanied by Rey Mysterio to a nice ovation. Doug Basham came out next with Danny Basham and Orlando Jordan. After the bell sounded, Basham took RVD into the corner and the two men traded right hands. Fans chanted “RVD” as Van Dam worked Basham to the mat. RVD hit an atomic drop but missed a wheel kick as Basham slid to the outside. Basham went after Rey who pushed Basham down to the floor. The referee, seeing only Rey’s retaliation, promptly sent Rey back to the locker room. RVD hit a baseball slide and then a moonsault. RVD tossed Basham back into the ring for a cover but Basham tossed RVD back outside. Basham tossed RVD into the ring steps and then measured some knees to the back after tossing RVD back inside the ring. Basham grabbed a bow and arrow to continue working the back of Van Dam. Basham went to the top rope but RVD caught him and landed a series of kicks. RVD hit a monkey flip out of the corner and then followed up with a thrust kick. RVD hit the Rolling Thunder and started to go to the top for the Five Star Frog Splash but was distracted by Danny. Jordan came into the ring and handed Basham a lead pipe. Meanwhile, Jordan distracted the ref and the Bashams did the switcheroo. Danny hit a spinning, sit-out chokeslam and got the three count at the five minute mark.
Trevor: OK match.
Eddie: This was alright.
Backstage, Kurt Angle walked into what he thought was Amy Weber’s locker room prior to the commercial break.
Back from the break, Angle was shown waiting patiently for Amy Weber inside her dressing room. He decided to go into the bathroom where she was apparently taking a shower. Angle decided to strip down to his skivvies and join Weber in the shower only to find out that it was Joy Giovanni instead. They both began screaming as Joy begged for Angle to get out of dressing room. Angle then swiped the towel away from Joy. Angle chased after her only to find her in the comforting arms of the Big Show. Angle attempted to explain the situation while zipping up his pants but the Big Show had none of it. Big Show chased Angle all the way out to the ring and the two began brawling. Big Show landed a head butt and then a vicious chop in the corner. Jindrak came in with a chair but was met with a big boot and a chokeslam. Big Show booted a charging Luther Reigns but then Angle nailed Show in the back with the chair. Show turned around and punched the chair into Angle’s face and tossed him out of the ring to a big pop.
Trevor: Interesting.
Eddie: That was unique. Something we haven’t seen Angle get involved to, at least not to that extent. (That good Stephanie storylines comes to mind.) I think Angle was funny, but too dorky to make this good.
Back from commercial, they aired a replay of the preceding events.
Backstage, JBL bragged about his little set-up of Angle to Amy and Orlando Jordan. He peeled off the “Amy Weber” sign in front of the locker room of Joy Giovanni as the three had a good laugh about it. JBL praised Amy Weber as a great Image Consultant.
Time for this week’s Raw Rebound. They aired highlights of the Elimination Chamber buildup from Raw including the Batista/Benoit and the HHH/Orton matches. No pictures of Edge and Jericho until the Main Event melee that led to Orton pinning the Game.
Meanwhile, Heidenreich was shown boxing the wall in his dressing room as Heyman approached him to see if he was ready for their match. Heyman reminded Heidenreich that if they win tonight, he won’t have to worry about a casket match and that Heidenreich will get to choose the stipulation for their Royal Rumble match. Heidenreich once again reassured Heyman that he had nothing to worry about.
Undertaker vs. Heidenreich and Paul Heyman
Main event time as Heidenreich came out with his usual, delirious facial expressions. Paul Heyman appeared to look worried as Cole put over that he was “petrified” about getting into the ring with the Undertaker. Taker then came out to his smoked-filled, deadman entrance to a big pop (although I’ve heard bigger for Taker). Bell rang and the two locked up. Heidenreich grabbed a headlock and then hit a shoulderblock, but Taker popped right up. Heidenreich hit another shoulderblock, but then Taker executed a hip toss and an arm drag. Taker then went to the ropes for Old School but Heidenreich punched out of it. Heidenreich body slammed Taker and landed a pair of elbows for a two count. Heidenreich grabbed a rear chin lock as the crowd went into a “Taker” chant. Taker tried to punch out but Heidenreich gave him a boot to slow his momentum. Heidenreich worked Taker in the corner but Taker reversed and landed some rights of his own. Heidenriech went for a clothesline but Taker ducked under a hit of flying clothesline on Heidenreich instead. Taker hit snake eyes in the corner and then landed a big boot. Taker then went back and hit the Old School elbow drop. He then dropped to his knees and summoned the druids who brought out a pair of caskets as Heidenreich went ballistic. The first casket opened next to the ring and Heidenreich quickly tagged in Heyman and then jumped the rail and headed for the exits. Taker focused his attention toward Heyman who looked he had just soiled himself. Taker picked up Heyman and delivered the Tombstone, then he turned his attention toward the casket. Taker rolled Heyman into the casket and shut the lid. Taker’s music began playing so the match officially ends in a no contest (I guess) as the lights fade to black.
Trevor: Heyman is off to the land of Paul Bearer.
Eddie: Was this really main event material? I guess so was the Paul Bearer/Dudleyz storyline.
Trevor (5)
This was forgettable, useless, and badly written, but the execution was solid. Considering the fact that this show is now written by a pandering David Lagana, edited by an empowered Bryan Gewirtz, and glanced at by distant former-genius Vince McMahon, the show’s quality is a good reflection of what WWE wants Smackdown to be. For us, it will continue to be a show without substance.
Eddie: (6)
Other than Mysterio vs. Guerrero, this show felt like a waste. SmackDown needs a direction and a purpose for everything they do! Once they get that, maybe things will start going their way more often.
